


Featherweight

by dontcryMasha



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe, Bottom Castiel, Castiel Works in a Bookstore, Feathers & Featherplay, Foreplay, Happy Ending, M/M, Mechanic Dean Winchester, Mild Kink, Mutual Masturbation, Sensitivity, Singing, Top Dean, patience - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-30
Updated: 2014-10-30
Packaged: 2018-02-23 04:31:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 20,347
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2534291
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dontcryMasha/pseuds/dontcryMasha
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It seemed the Castiel, the shy young man working at the bookstore downtown, had sworn off sex and dating because of his past experiences. But it's love at first sight for Dean, and he won't give up on Cas no matter how long it takes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Featherweight

Castiel Novak liked very particular things. He enjoyed a cup of peppermint tea, lightly sweetened with honey while he was reading. He thought classical music was one of mankind’s greatest achievements and shuddered when any other kind of music played. He liked the sound of rain hitting his window while he sat in bed late at night, eyes closed and thinking of faraway lands (“How does rain sound in Tokyo? The same, I’m sure…”). He had a small yet bowl on his nightstand which was filled with tiny, tiny polished stones. Running his fingers through them was stimulating, as it didn’t take much to tickle his senses. A smooth rock, the low hum of large wind chimes, quinoa steaming.

He was particular about sexuality, too; he loved to have sex but even if his partner was gentle enough, the idea of it embarrassed him. In general he couldn’t find anyone who was soft enough, though. Because of his sensitivity, tiny kisses and light strokes were enough to get him off. Anything too rough was upsetting.

Once he had a lover who wanted to film them, and upon watching the video he was shocked and appalled by what he saw. “I never realized how unattractive I look and sound,” he said, and ever since then he refused to have sex with any guy anywhere. He was twenty-five and hadn’t made love in almost six years, claiming that his head was better off between two pages than two legs and a bookmark against his lips rather than a cock.

Dean Winchester, however, loved sex. The “God given gift” of a nine and a half inch pecker wasn’t something he would publically boast about, but its knowledge lent him extra confidence when it came to picking up men and the occasional woman. He would often flock to clubs and bars to find the best booty he could bring home, but when he was at work he kept it on the down-low. Nobody working at Singer Salvage knew he was bi.

Other than that, he was a classic rock fan. During the summer, it wasn’t unlike Dean to wake up on a Sunday with a raging headache and a new tattoo, staring at a ceiling he didn’t recognize only to realize he had stumbled into a motel after a Stones concert. He liked his coffee strong and black, his whiskey even stronger and every now and then he might be seen hitting a joint at a party. From the outside he might have appeared to be the usual twenty-six year old who just happened to be extremely handsome (the perfect blend of ruggedly handsome and boyishly beautiful), renting a room and drinking too much, but his fine details were deeper. He loved old cars and truly appreciated them as works of art. He often said that “no fancy-assed luxury sedan could beat my ’67 Impala,” and “You can keep your fucking computers.” Movies made in the 70s and 80s would always be superior to the ones in the theater and there was no finer thing in the world than the smell of old leather and a cold beer.

On paper, Dean and Castiel were complete opposites; fire and water, heaven and earth, October and April. They weren’t even looking for the same thing when it came to “relationships.” Alright, well technically neither of them wanted a relationship at all, but Dean only wanted physical touch and Castiel wanted nothing of the sort. No, no, that wasn’t true, for Castiel _did_ want touch he was just embarrassed about it and hypersensitive. He masturbated from time to time but always felt gross afterwards. Dean masturbated daily and often in multiple sessions.

Castiel worked at a bookstore. He found the quiet of pages turning, people shuffling over flat carpet as they search for the perfect book to be peaceful. It never got very loud, even for the three-level chain store that it was or when people like Dean Winchester came in.

He had his hands in the pockets of a dark green jacket, walking with a swagger behind a man slightly taller and younger than him. The companion seemed to know where he was going and Dean just followed, glancing around the place as if he had never once heard the word “book” equated with a volume of papers, printed with words.

“Hey, Cas,” Dean’s friend said as he passed by Castiel, who stood shelving at the romance section.

“Hello, Sam.”

Dean remained silent while he followed Sam but caught a glimpse of Castiel and stared. He slowed down and smiled nervously, quite unusual behavior for him. Cas dropped _Thrills in the Night_. “Oh!” After he picked it off the floor, Sam and Dean were gone.

“Yo Sammy—“ Dean said, charging up to the young man. “Who was that guy?”

“Who, Cas?”

“Yeah.”

Sam shrugged. “He’s just a bookseller here.”

“How’d you know his name?”

“Because I’ve talked to him. He knows a lot so I know he’s great to ask for recommendations.”

“ _Oh_ ,” Dean hummed, following his friend still. He might have been out of his element in the bookstore, but Sam was right at home. They went down an escalator and to the sci-fi/fantasy section. The middle of the store had all of the escalators in a big expanse, surrounded by railings on each level. It was easy to look down to the lower levels if you went to the sides. Castiel had come over to the railing and watched them descend. Sam gesticulated with both hands as he spoke.

“When the first three came out, they were still using the old publishing company,” he said. They had changed subjects quickly and Dean looked bored. “Now, they charged Beazley more but I _swear_ the books were better. But that probably doesn’t make sense, right?”

“Right,” Dean agreed blankly.

They reached the bottom of the escalator and Sam darted off towards the section he knew well. There was a heavyset guy around their age standing in the middle of the aisle with a paperback of the latest space battle series. Dean made a face at him as they squeezed behind his sweaty frame, but Sam was fixed on what he came for.

“Bales…Bay…Baxter…ah, here, Beazley.”

“Mmhmm.” Dean glanced around as his friend looked for the novel he needed. He turned his head up and stared at the skylight, two floors above him. Castiel’s head was peeking over the side but withdrew quickly as soon as he saw Dean look. But he wasn’t quick enough for Dean not to notice. “Isn’t there anything upstairs you wanted to check?”

“Huh?” Sam wanted to peel his eyes off of the book but he couldn’t. “I mean, I have to buy it up there so I will go back.”

“Okay.”

“Why?”

“Nothin’.”

“Mmm.” Sam hummed. He looked at the back of the book then nodded and started to walk towards the escalators. Dean perked up. “Alright, we’re good to go.”

“Cool.”

Castiel had retreated to the aisle he was working on again, shuffling around and putting books in their correct spaces. He took a deep breath when he saw Sam and Dean reappear over the railing, stepping off of the escalator. Sam had a book in his hands so he knew they were headed to checkout. He breathed a short sigh of relief knowing that Dean would go right by him but likely not need to talk. Cas wasn’t good at talking to random, attractive men, especially if they had stared at him earlier.

“Cas, right?”

The unknown voice made the hair on his neck stand. Holding his breath, he slowly turned around and saw Dean standing there, hands still in his pockets and a sheepish look on his face. “My brother, Sam, says you’re good at recommending books.”

“Yes,” Cas said shortly, running his fingers along the spine of _The Midnight Maiden’s Garden of Lust_ and fixing his eyes to the floor.

“What’s something for a guy like me, who uh, doesn’t read much but wants to.”

Speaking in a small voice, but still gravelly as he naturally sounded, Cas explained, “That depends what genre you would like. Fiction or non-fiction?”

Dean shrugged, blushing. He didn’t know the difference but could easily figure it out if he thought about it. The whole thing didn’t much matter since he really just wanted to talk with the guy.

“What do _you_ like?” Dean asked.

“Oh!” Cas said with a short gasp. He flicked his eyes up at Dean briefly, catching what looked like pretty green eyes and a fine speckling of freckles. “I’ve read so much, I’m not even sure where to begin. However I am very fond of anything by Don Ronaldson. In fact, I’ve reread _Bathin of Tythihoz_ many, many times. I’m not sure if you would like it, though; it’s a fantasy novella that follows a demon. The readers are few and far between but those who love it are great fans. I’ve actually met Ronaldson and—oh my, I’ve been speaking too much, haven’t I?”

Dean’s eyes were glazed over as he stared at Cas. “N-no, not at all,” Dean said. In fact, he was disappointed that Cas had stopped talking. “What was that? _Bathing the Tittyhorse_ or something?”

Cas blushed furiously. “ _Bathin of Tythihoz_ ,” he corrected Dean in a mere mutter. “I’ll show you.”

The romance novel was put away and Castiel immediately dashed off. Dean followed him, heart in his throat. They went all the way back down the escalators he had just been down but passed the heavy guy (still reading and with great enthusiasm at every turn of the page) and stopped at the far corner. Cas knew exactly where he was going and barely had to look at the shelf before he pulled out a tiny, paperback novel and handed it to Dean.

“Here you are,” Cas announced. Dean thanked him and took it but the moment Dean’s hand touched it, Cas retracted rather quickly. “Mind you, it may not be your ‘cup of tea’ since most people aren’t big fans.”

Dean analyzed the cover briefly. It was a rather detailed drawing in full color, which depicted a burly man who had a long, scaly tale growing from his rear and sat upon a sickly looking horse. There was a great fire behind him and the edge of the picture had strange symbols within a heptagon.

“Dunno, looks pretty cool to me,” Dean muttered.

“I highly invite you to give it a shot,” Cas hummed. He tried to smile but his nervousness got the best of him, so instead he quickly said, “enjoy” and ran off. Dean watched him leave, shrugging in his mind.

“What took you so long?!” Sam huffed as Dean reappeared and joined the checkout line, which his brother had long since exited. He held a bag imprinted with the bookstore’s name in his fist, now bent at his hip.

“I was looking for something,” Dean said, showing the little book to Sam.

“I thought you didn’t want to read ‘anything ever.’”

“Well I changed my mind, okay?”

“Ugh.”

Dean bought his book and slipped it into his back pocket. Half of it stuck out but he could feel it alright in case it fell out. They walked around the building and to the lot in the back, where Dean had parked his old car at a meter. The brothers got in and Dean chucked the book onto the middle of the bench seat.

“Don Ronaldson?” Sam asked, picking it up. “This is really not your kind of reading.”

“Says who?”

“Says _everyone_. Do you know the types of people who like these books?”

“Sort of.”

Sam sighed and put it back on the seat. He turned his face towards the window as Dean started the engine and backed out of the space.

“Strange, quiet, anti-social people who would rather stay in their rooms and draw pentagrams on everything than do anything constructive with their lives.”

“Jeez, didn’t peg you as the judgmental type, Sammy.”

“I’m not trying to be cruel or harsh, but you understand that type, right? Ronaldson appeals to a very strange crowd.”

“Maybe I’m strange?”

Sam sighed once more. “Not like that, Dean. Not like that.”

* * *

The book was very strange indeed, but not in the way that Dean had predicted. Its plot followed a demon named Bathin and how he was sent to Earth in a man’s body to find a couple people who were intent on destroying Hell. He eventually met them but ended up falling in love with one. The writing was simple yet compelling enough to keep Dean interested, even though his coworkers harassed him for sitting with a book during his lunch break.

“Didn’t know you could read, boy,” said Bobby, the owner of the garage. Dean just stuck his tongue out at them and Gabe, another mechanic there, chuckled incessantly. None of their taunting fazed Dean at all though, because he was determined to chat up Castiel again and with a purpose.

Now what _did_ throw him off was how the demon fell in love with a _man_. Not only were they romantically engaged but they also had frequent scenes of gratuitous gay sex. It was intense enough to make Dean blush (which is serious) but more so question why Cas would recommend such a thing. He appeared to be so coy but perhaps his way of showing interest was to suggest that book?

When Dean finally finished the it, he returned to the bookstore in search of the young man in question. He didn’t see him at first so he went to the help desk and asked for Cas. An older woman standing there plainly suggested checking the travel section. “Thanks,” said Dean.

“Third floor.”

“Thanks,” he said again, then swaggered away. He took the escalators upstairs and began scanning the signs at the aisles for travel. There, in the back, he found what he was looking for.

Cas was wearing a pair of black pants with a light blue polo, carefully putting large books away on the top shelf. Dean stood at the end for a moment and watched him work. He had a lovely butt which was flattered by his slacks. When he leaned over the cart to get another book, Dean held his breath. But enough fooling around—Dean was an expert on smooth talking sexy young men and women and he had nothing to be nervous about. However he had trouble moving his feet. Cas was just so _pretty_ and _innocent_ , much like a deer wandering a sunny meadow.

Too late. Cas saw him first. He froze and locked eyes, opening his mouth in a way that likely muttered “oh, my.”

“Hey,” Dean said, starting to take a few steps forward. He shoved his hands into his pockets and wet his lips. Cas stood his ground, fingering a handbook on Amsterdam. “How’re you, Cas?”

“I’m good,” Cas hummed, trying to smile. “Y-yourself?”

“Good, good,” Dean nodded. His eyes turned down to the floor and he kicked at it. Somehow he was feeling very sheepish. “So uh, I finished that book.”

“ _Bathin ofTythihoz_?”

“Yep.”

A bigger, uncontrollable smile appeared on Cas’ face. His blue eyes flickered like icy flames. “Did you enjoy it?”

“I did. It was really…good.”

“I’m glad. It’s a favorite of mine, but I’ve already told you that.”

Dean chuckled. “Yeah, I get why.”

“You know he’s written many books. You should read more of them if you enjoyed _Bathin_. They tend to be quite similar.”

Dean wanted to ask if they were all homoerotic but he bit his tongue. Cas dropped his smile and put the book in his hands away. It was awkwardly silent for a moment. How was this happening? Dean never _ever_ let silence fall between him and a potential lover. What made Cas different?

“It’d be cool if we could talk about it more,” Dean finally said (and rather quickly, too).

“Oh?”

“Yeah, y’know, over a beer or something.”

Cas suddenly turned bright red. He nearly dropped _Scenic Ireland._

“Is that okay?” Dean asked, softer this time. Cas nodded.

“Y-yes,” he said, “I like that idea. When are um, when are you normally free?”

“After four. I’m free now. When’s your shift over today?”

“Ahh,” Cas nodded. “Just an hour. Do you want to meet up afterwards?”

Dean grinned wide. “Sounds awesome. Out front?”

“Indeed.”

“Cool. Oh, I’m Dean by the way.”

“Dean?” Cas asked, sounding his name as if it reminded him of something. “Nice to meet you, Dean. I look forward to seeing you in an hour.”

“Alright, awesome,” Dean said with a smirk. He began walking backwards, throwing tiny waves over his head at Cas. “I’ll see ya…”

* * *

One painful hour later, Dean was standing in front of the store, hands still in his pockets. He hadn’t done much other than roam the streets with a nervous beat in his heart over meeting up with Cas. There was so much he wanted to know about the guy.

Every time the doors to the booksellers opened, his attention was fixed and a tingle rushed through his body, but tons of people came and went, leaving him rather stressed. Why? Why so stressed? It was un-Dean like to say the least. But finally the doors pushed open and Castiel came out.

“Oh. Hello, Dean,” he said, looking a bit surprised.

“Hey.”

“Did you have a place in mind?”

“Not really. I know almost all the bars around here so…what d’you prefer?”

Cas shook his head shyly. “It doesn’t matter,” he spoke softly.

“Oh, okay. Well I really like _Melinda’s_ and it’s pretty quiet, too. You ever been there?”

“No, but I’ve seen it many times.”

“Wanna try?”

“That sounds lovely, thank you.”

They began to walk. It was a beautiful day, just on the brink of autumn. The leaves were beginning to change and the smell of summer was fading away into smokiness. Scarf weather was just around the corner.

“You live around here?” Dean asked. He was keeping his body hunched up together, heart pounding in his throat.

“Yes, very close. I have a condo.”

“Damn. Really? That’s pretty impressive.”

“Oh, nothing extraordinary. My father owns it but he moved, so now I stay there alone.”

“Sounds like a sweet deal.”

“Indeed. I couldn’t afford it on my own. One day I would love to buy it from him.”

“Cool,” Dean said with a smile. He looked at Cas quickly but then tore his eyes away. Cas had probably the most unique and beautiful face Dean had ever seen; his eyes creased at the sides and his profile gave way to an almost flat mouth. But from the front he looked even better, with pretty wide lips and an adorable, wide jawline.

“Here it is.”

Their trip came to a halt in front of a little hole in the wall with the word _Melinda’s_ in neon above an overhang. Dean went ahead and held the door open for Cas, which made him blush as he walked through. It wasn’t very crowded so they could nab one of the four booths along the wall. A couple people talked quietly at the bar and two other tables were occupied.

“This is nice,” Cas remarked, looking around at the interior.

“Yeah, I know the bartender. I basically know every bartender in town.”

“Is that so? Do you drink a lot?”

“Not _a lot_ , but I go out all the time.”

“Ah. Interesting.”

Their server came, who also happened to know Dean and gave him a “oh, you have a _very_ cute date today” smile as they ordered drinks. Dean had a draught beer and Cas just wanted water with lemon.

“I’m not a big fan of alcohol,” the darker haired guy admitted, blushing. “It’s too strong for me.”

“I can’t imagine living without drinking,” said Dean. He chuckled but Cas looked so horrified at what he may have implied, he corrected himself by saying, “You know, ever. I don’t mean drinking constantly. Uh…do you wanna eat anything?”

“I’m not terribly hungry but the tomato bisque looks tempting.”

“I’ve never had it.”

“I’ll try.”

Cas got a small bowl of that soup, which he enjoyed slowly and Dean ordered a bacon cheeseburger.

“So about the book,” Dean said after swallowing a big bite. He cleared his throat and stared at the plate.

“Yes?”

“It was really, um, good. Yeah. And I thought the way Bathin fell for Jonathan was err…it was _different_.”

Cas tilted his head slowly as he stared at Dean. “Are you attempting to discuss the sensuality with me?”

“UH!” Dean looked like he might choke. “Y-yeah, I guess!”

“I’ve done much reading, Dean. I’m not upset or offended by anything of the sort. You have no reason to feel bad.”

“Okay, okay,” Dean said, nodding. He assumed Cas must have been playing up the innocent act and now the walls were coming down. “So yeah. Those sex scenes were written super well.”

“They’re quite graphic.”

They said nothing more of the book during the remainder of their meal. The check came and Dean insisted on paying, which clearly flattered Cas and made him blush. He blushed so easily and over anything. Once it was paid for, they stepped outside and Dean rubbed his hands together. “Feels like dessert,” he muttered.

“Why didn’t you order anything at the restaurant?” Cas asked.

“Okay, so I love that place, right? But they have _crap_ pie.”

“Pie?”

Dean nodded vigorously, rubbing his hands again and raising is shoulders. “I love me some pie.”

“I have half a peach pie at my condo,” Cas said rather innocently. Ah! Dean perked up at these words and smiled. That was his ticket in. He knew Cas would drop a bomb like that.

“You wanna go have some together?” he asked. Cas nodded.

“I live very close. I’ll show you.”

Dean’s heart rate picked up but now the feeling of excitement was moving south; sweet, innocent little Cas would soon be naked, moaning his name. _Oh God yes_ , Dean thought to himself, imagining how he might look with a big fat cock in his mouth. That innocent act worked real well for him.

Cas’ condo was the building at the corner, just two blocks from the booksellers. They went in through the lobby and took the elevator to the ninth floor. Dean didn’t say much and also hesitated to make on a move on him until they got inside.

“Here,” said Cas, leading them to #906. He unlocked the door and held it for Dean.

It was a beautiful little condo, modestly furnished with serene landscapes framed on the walls. He had a couple knickknacks on shelves and an iPod dock with expensive looking speakers on one side. There was no TV as far as Dean could tell. He took a couple steps inside and Cas shut the door before gracefully stepping over to the kitchen.

“Here is the pie,” he announced. Dean was still standing in the living room and checking things out. There was the faint sound of a tiny bell jingling and then a small, black cat peeked its head around the corner and Dean. They stared at each other and the cat disappeared.

“Jupiter,” Cas said from the kitchen. The sounds of plates moving could be heard.

“The cat?” Dean asked.

“Yes.”

Dean came into the same room as Cas finally and watched him as he cut two slices of fat, peach pie and plated them. “Would you like anything to drink with this? I can make tea.”

“That’s alright, but thanks.”

Cas handed Dean his plate and fork delicately and led him towards a small dining room which was between the kitchen and living room. They sat down and started to eat. Dean sighed happily as he tried the pie. “Where’d you get this? It’s _awesome_.”

“The grocery store at the bottom of my building,” Cas said, taking a tiny bite. “They have a wonderful bakery section and if you haven’t been there, I highly recommend it.”

“Yeah apparently,” Dean agreed, having another bite and nearly moaning from it. The slice was gone almost instantly but Cas didn’t finish his.

“It tastes lovely but sometimes I find the filling to be too sweet.”

“Really? It was perfect as far as I’m concerned. Thanks.”

Cas smiled and stood up, taking their plates to the sink. He turned his back to Dean and began washing them very gently. “Do you like Vivaldi, Dean?”

“I dunno what that is,” Dean said, getting up as well. He slowly walked behind Cas.

“You don’t know? Oh, my. Here.”

Cas dries his hands on a towel and took a small remote which was Velcro’d to the fridge. He hit a button and a second iPod dock which Dean had overlooked, nailed to the underside of a cabinet, began to play very soft classical music. Cas closed his eyes and hummed happily. “Now isn’t this perfect?”

“Yeah.”

Dean came up to Cas and suddenly slipped his arms around his waist then pulled him close for a kiss, his face going to Cas’ neck.

“YAAA!” Cas yelped. He huddled over, clutching around his stomach and shooed Dean away. Dean, looking horrified and thinking he was hurt, put his hands on Cas’ arm. “No!” Cas shouted, sounding quite upset. “D-don’t touch me!”

Dean’s hands retracted and he stared at him, unsure of what to do. “What’s wrong?!” he asked. “Are you in pain?!”

“N-no, it’s…it’s nothing, please…just go…please…”

“I can’t leave you like this.”

“I understand…hng…” Cas slid onto the floor and rolled into a little pile, trembling. “I know you must feel terrible but please, _please_ understand…I’m not mad…please just leave…”

Dean’s eyes wiggled helplessly. How could he leave him alone like that? He didn’t even know what was wrong.

“Please,” Cas said again.

Nervous and confused, Dean backed out of the kitchen. “I’m sorry,” he said. “So sorry, Cas.”

“Not your fault…”

Dean left the condo and the door closed quietly. Cas gasped and tried to catch his breath. “Aah,” he sighed to himself, slowly getting to his feet. “No…”

He walked oddly to his bedroom where he unzipped his pants and dropped them to the floor before sitting, exposing a semi-hardon that was soaked in thick, sloppy cum. Cas blushed profusely at the sight and used a tissue to lightly clean it up. His cock throbbed at each touch.

“Now you’ve run him away,” he muttered to himself sadly, “ _and_ soiled yourself.”

He kicked off the jizz-ridden pants and put on a clear pair of briefs. Without even washing up, he crawled beneath the covers and put his face in the pillows, damning his sensitivity. Jupiter sat at the edge of the bed and purred until Cas fell asleep.

* * *

Dean didn’t know what to do. Fear and disgust with himself overwhelmed everything he did and practically put the brakes on his life following his failed date with Cas. Being turned down wasn’t entirely alien to Dean and in the past he had handled it well, but the image of Cas curling in pain for no apparent reason, followed by a plead for him to leave was burned into his memory. Why? Why would Cas do that? What happened? Dean wondered if he had a serious medical condition that perchance had been disturbed.

For two long, painful weeks did Dean avoid the bookstore. He kept telling himself that it wasn’t meant to be and he should move on, but the fact that Cas was so apologetic made him hang on. That’s when he decided to return.

A cold front that came by the night before gave way to considerably chillier air, so Dean put on a heavier jacket and a layer of flannel between it and his t-shirt. Work was slow and made slower by his plan to find Cas, but eventually it came time to go and he certainly didn’t dawdle.

Visiting the bookstore wasn’t an original idea since many, many people were wandering the aisles, most of which had coffee and other warm drinks from the café on the third floor. Dean passed by several young couples and chatty families as he had his eyes fixed on the help desk. There was another young man working there and when Dean asked if Castiel was working, he was told to search the lower level, where Cas was likely giving assistance. Dean thanked the guy then dashed down the escalator, spotting that soft head of dark hair as he descended. Cas was talking to a woman near biographies.

“Great,” she said, gesturing to the small stack of books in her hands, “You’ve been a big help. Thank you.”

“The pleasure is all mine. Enjoy the rest of your evening.”

The patron smiled and walked away, no doubt headed upstairs to checkout. Then Cas turned around and saw Dean right there, hands in his pockets and a nervous look on his face.

“Hey,” Dean said, kicking the ground.

“Hello, Dean. How are you?”

“Fine. Was wondering the same about yourself?”

Cas lightly pulled at the hem of his shirt, eyes angled down there, too. “I’ve been well. Certainly hoped to have ran into you sooner than this.”

“Sorry.” Dean felt bad now. This whole time he had been hiding from Cas on the notion that Cas didn’t want to see him.

“There’s no reason to apologize,” Cas reassured him. “I should be sorry. Um, Dean, listen…” He took a couple steps closer and whispered, “I would appreciate speaking to you after my shift. I shouldn’t discuss personal matters while I’m on the clock.”

“Right, right,” Dean said with a nod. “When do you get off?”

“Seven.”

“Want me to come back?”

“If you don’t mind.”

“I’ll buy you dinner. If that’s still cool with you.”

Cas blushed hotly. “Y-yes,” he said, plucking his shirt harder, “I’d like that.”

“Meet you out front at seven.”

“Yes.”

Cas smiled briefly before turning away and disappearing behind another shelf. His heart filled with excitement. Dean was back! Those last two weeks had been torture for him, expecting to see him or at least his brother so he could get a word in. He thought Dean must have been angry with him or disappointed that they didn’t have sex. In all honesty, Cas didn’t realize how offering pie at his condo seemed like a lead-in to intimacy. He felt like a fool after that, but seeing Dean come back made all of that disappear.

At seven o’clock, Cas stepped out of his bookstore to find Dean sitting on a bench around the entrance. He was diddling around on his phone, but once Cas showed up he turned it off and slipped it into a front pocket on his jacket. He then sprung to his feet and grinned. “Hey,” he said, “How’d it go?”

“What?”

“Your shift.”

“Oh. It was fine. Thank you for asking. Do you know where we’re going?”

“I guess you’d like me to pick?” Cas nodded. “Ever been to The Main Street Grill?”

“N-no, but it seems rather crowded, doesn’t it?”

“Yeah it can get a little intense. Is that not good for you?”

“Sorry…”

“No worries, no worries.” Dean cleared his throat and started to walk. Cas followed, arms folded. “You like sushi?”

“Oooh,” Cas cooed, as if hearing the word reminded him that something glorious existed. “I do, actually!”

“Heheh okay, then let’s go to Nagasaki. They’re real good.”

Cas smiled happily as he followed Dean a couple blocks to a pretty, modern corner restaurant. Inside there was soft shamisen music playing while several tables had people muttering as they ate. The furniture was all made of black lacquerware and along one of the walls there was a series of koi paintings. A thin Japanese woman who spoke poor English seated Cas and Dean near the window.

“How’s this?” Dean asked, trying to talk quiet like everyone else inside the restaurant. Cas took a seat happily and traced his finger over the gold designs made into the table. Clearly he wished to savor the atmosphere for a moment before he spoke.

“Perfect,” he said, closing his eyes momentarily. Dean picked up his menu and grinned. “Good,” he said, “I’m starting to figure out what you like.”

“Yes, about that,” Cas began, looking sad.

“What?”

“You see, Dean, there’s something I have to tell you about myself.”

“Oh?” Dean swallowed stiffly. That’s never a good sign when a date begins a sentence like that, especially after that incident two weeks prior.

“I’m, um,” Cas seemed to be embarrassed, “I’m very sensitive.”

“Yeah, that’s good.”

“No, no, I’m very, _very_ sensitive.”

Dean didn’t quite pick up on what Cas was insinuating. “You seem like a smart, emotional guy. That’s cool. I get it.”

Cas shook his head and leaned over the table to be a bit closer to Dean, though he continued to look down. “You don’t understand,” he said, “My senses are acutely receptive, not just with being tactile but all of them. I’m considerably easier to stimulate than most people and that often causes me to be _over_ stimulated.”

“ _Oh_ ,” Dean said, still slightly unsure of what that meant. “So uh, how’s this bad?”

“I’m not good with being touched,” Cas admitted. He sat in his seat better and tried to hide behind his menu. “When, um, when you um, tried to kiss me last time…” His voice faded and Dean peeked over at him.

“That was bad, I get it,” he said. Here, the waitress interrupted to take their drink orders.

“No, it wasn’t _bad_ , Dean, it was simply…it was simply not good for my oversensitivity. Do you understand?”

“Peculiar…”

“I am, I’m sorry. I understand if this might be too difficult for you.”

Dean shook his head and smiled. “No, not at all,” he said, “You’re real sweet and smart. So you don’t like being touched, I can—“

Cas cut him off. “You misunderstand. I _love_ to be touched. I just can’t handle it right away.”

“Ah…”

“I’m sorry.”

“You can’t help it, that’s fine.”

The waitress arrived with a glass of Chinese beer for Dean and a glass of water for Cas. “Thank you,” Cas said softly. He turned his eyes to Dean finally. “A lot of guys have trouble with that, and I myself have decided it’s not worth the effort.”

“What’s not worth the effort?”

“Being with someone.”

Dean narrowed his eyes. “Wait, I don’t get it—are we _not_ out on a date?”

“We are.”

“So then how did you decide it’s not worth it?”

Cas blushed harder. He pulled the menu up over his face and muttered something but Dean asked him to repeat. “ _Because I rather like you_ ,” he hummed.

“I like you too, Cas. I wanna get to know you and your sensitivity.” Dean took a big swig of his beer then wet his lips. “I’m gonna get this steak teriyaki bento box. The bentos are the best deal, really. Look at what it all comes with.”

“So much,” Cas said quietly as he read the description. “I’m not sure I could eat all of it.”

“You can always take it home. Or I’ll eat it if you want.”

“Thank you…”

The waitress came to take their orders, just what Dean said and Cas had the salmon variation. They kept their chat light while they waited for their food to arrive. First came a bowl of miso soup and a salad.

“This is lovely,” Cas hummed to himself as he took the plastic bowl in one hand and his spoon in the other. He stirred the cloud of paste around in the broth then took a gentle sip. “Mmm…”

“Real nice, huh?”

“Quite delicious.”

“Glad you like it.”

“Mmm…”

“Hey, so, does your sensitivity apply to food, too?”

“Yes, usually. The taste and texture of what I eat is important, and I can’t handle anything too intense. This is just wonderful. In general sushi that isn’t spicy is a delight to my senses.”

“Good,” Dean said, smiling as he watched Cas eat. Each spoonful brought a wave of happiness to him.

“The salad dressing is too strong, though,” Cas said, frowning after tasting the tines of his fork.

“Oh, well. Don’t like ginger?”

“Not particularly. It’s just too much for me. You can have it, if you’d like.”

“Love to. Thanks.”

Then the bento boxes came. They were in pretty dishes that divided each item; six California rolls, six seafood shumai, a couple pieces of vegetable tempura and then the meat, which sat upon a bed of lightly sautéed vegetables. The server set them onto the table and both of the men grinned. Dean picked up his fork and began to eat straight away, but Cas was slightly more cautious. He started with the California rolls.

“These are good,” he said. “I like the rice, the bite of the seaweed, the creaminess of the avocado…”

Dean chewed a big mouthful of tempura shrimp. “Never thought about food that much,” he said. “It’s kinda different to pick it apart. I like it.”

Cas smiled meekly and continued to eat. He was good with all of it, although no tempura or soy sauce touched his plate. He managed to finish it, too.

“I guess it was good, huh?” Dean said, chuckling as he drank the last of his second beer. Cas dabbed the side of his mouth on a napkin and dropped it onto the empty platter.

“Just beautiful. Thank you so much for bringing me here.”

“Thanks for letting me take you. I really like spending time with you. I wanna do more.”

Cas blinked a few times, clearing his throat. “What would you like to do?” he asked softly.

“Well, what’s a perfect date for you?”

“Oh, I have to think about that.”

“Take your time.”

The check came with a couple slices of an orange. Cas nibbled on one happily but Dean just left cash and pushed the fruit closer to Cas.

“None for you?” Cas asked.

“Nah. Not really a fruit guy. Well, not unless it’s packed into a pastry.”

“But fruit is so good for you.”

“Eh.”

“Oh, well. More for me, I guess.”

“So how ‘bout your perfect date?”

“Ahh, right…”

They got up and put their jackets on. Cas was still contemplating the question.

“I love to be outside, and to take my time enjoying small things. You must understand that I love subtle stimulation. Everything, in my mind, has a scale to it, starting at no stimulus and going to _far too much_ stimulus.”

“Interesting.”

Dean held the door open and let Cas walk through. They stepped out into the cool night air and Cas hugged at himself.

“You cold?”

“A little.”

“Do you uh, do you want me to put my arm around you?”

Cas stared at Dean and shook his head violently in opposition. “It’s not you,” He explained when Dean looked alarmed, “It’s just my stimulation. I can’t have you touch me like that, not now, not this early…”

“It’s cool, don’t worry about it. I just feel bad ‘cause it’s gotta be difficult to live like that.”

“It is but it isn’t. I’ve gotten used to it.”

“Are you happy?”

Cas looked down at his feet. He sighed and they kept walking. “I’m very lonely,” he admitted.

“I had the feeling…”

“I’m so scared to let anyone close to me. Is that weird?”

“I don’t think so. Your nerves are serious business.”

“That’s true.”

“But hey, I’ll work with you on this. Promise, okay?”

Cas made an upset face and Dean tried to perk him up. “Hey,” he said, “It’s good, it’s good. I don’t mind.”

“But is that what you _want_ to be doing? Wouldn’t you rather be with a man who you can touch?”

Dean slowed down. “Well,” he took a deep breath and took softer, “To be perfectly honest I’d love to touch you. I’d love to—ooo—I’d love to touch you, kiss you, oh man, I’d do all sorts of things to you.”

Cas had stopped, too. He had his hands clapped over his face and his eyes shut. A couple leaves fell down around him from trees planted along the sidewalk.

“Cas?”

“S-sorry.”

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, don’t worry, please.”

“Are you _sure_?”

Cas dropped his hands slowly and flashed his pretty eyes at Dean. He smiled. “I’m sure. It’s just been a long time since I’ve heard anyone speak to me like that.”

“Sorry.”

“No, no, don’t apologize. There is zero reason to apologize.”

“Well, okay…”

They kept walking again. Cas was silent for a few moments. Dean kept looking over at him and seeing the streetlights reflected in his eyes.

“Are you working this weekend?” Dean asked.

“Saturday, but I’m off on Sunday.”

“Then let’s do something. We’ll go to a forest you like. How’s that?”

Cas smiled so much that he closed his eyes for a second. “That would be great. We’ll have a good time.”

They ended up at the bottom of Cas’ condominium, where Dean gave him his number then said goodbye without any touching.

* * *

“It’s beautiful, isn’t it?”

“Yeah…”

Dean had picked Cas up in the early afternoon and driven to a nearby lake. Cas was a bit miffed during the ride as Dean insisted on playing _his_ music, but all in all he was rather calm and mostly smiled. They arrived at the lake and had been walking along the path that ran around it, which was covered in trees as the lake was in the middle of a forest. Cas enjoyed himself very much. He took slow steps, looking all around, here and there and breathing slowly. This was his element. He stopped at one part where the trees dwindled and many low, flat rocks bled down to the water’s edge. He squat there and began running is fingers over small stones.

“I think it’s amazing how one can find so much comfort in tiny things.”

“Yeah?” Dean asked, smiling big at Cas as he sat on one of the larger rocks. Cas picked up a smooth river rock and fingered it blissfully.

“I have to live my life that way.”

“I guess so.”

Dean set his elbows to his knees and clasped his hands together, looking over at the lake. A couple kayakers moved by in the distance. “Can I ask you something personal?”

Cas looked over at Dean and blinked. “I suppose…but I can’t guarantee an answer.”

“That’s fine, just thought I’d ask.” He cleared his throat. “You uh, you ever had a boyfriend?”

“Yes. Two. Why?”

“I’m sorta wondering how that worked. You don’t have to tell me if you don’t wanna.”

“Ah, no worries.” Cas started pocketing some of the rocks. “To be fair, I haven’t been intimate in many years, thus heightening my sensitivity. It was _quite_ this intense back then. But my first boyfriend was also quite sensitive—we learned about our condition together. Unfortunately we just weren’t a good match in the long run. I was eighteen anyway.

“My second boyfriend was not at all sensitive, but he understood, much like you. We were close enough that we had a significant amount of intimacy and touching.”

Dean raised his eyebrows at this. “Oh, yeah? He asked. Cas nodded.

“Yes. Actually…”

Here, Cas’ voice faded into a tiny noise that disappeared. He stood up and stared out over the water.

“What’s wrong?” Dean asked.

“I’m going to tell you something stupid.”

“Huh? Stupid? Doubt it.”

“I don’t know why, Dean, but I feel comfortable with you.”

“That’s not stupid.”

“No, no, that isn’t what I’m preparing to say.”

Dean considered standing up as well, but he didn’t want to invade Cas’ personal space. He looked at him concernedly, then Cas turned to him and sighed.

“I stopped seeing my last boyfriend for reasons unrelated to my sensitivity.”

“Really?”

“Yes…”

“Oh,” Dean hummed, “Do you wanna tell me why?”

Cas nodded again, but then raised his hand over his lips like he was confessing something incredibly humiliating. “I heard—ah—I observed myself in the bedroom.”

Dean blushed. He blushed and blushed, wet his lips and blushed some more. Instantly the image of Cas getting fucked, (which was on his mind often anyway) was stuck in his head. A million questions followed shortly thereafter, mostly wondering how he liked it and what felt best to him. But Dean remained quiet.

“I know, it’s strange, but—I just hated it. Everything; how I sounded, the way my body twisted and contracted. It was so repulsive to me that I couldn’t bear to subject another to it.”

“But Cas,” Dean simply had to interrupt, “You’re _beautiful_.”

Cas closed his eyes tightly and shook his head. “N-not like that,” he muttered.

“Oh _Cas_ , you’ve gotta be wrong about that. Man, I wish I could hold you.”

“No,” Cas sighed. “I know.”

Dean stood up now but shoved his hands into his pockets. “You wanna keep walking?”

“Yes.”

They got back on the path and continued for a ways. Nothing more about that topic was mentioned, but once they had rounded half of the lake, Cas slowed down for a moment.

“You okay?” Dean asked, turning to him.

“Dean?”

“Yeah?”

“I want to hold your hand.”

“Oh, okay. That’s fine.” He smiled warmly and extended his hand to Cas, but he shook his head.

“I-I can’t hold it all,” he muttered, “Maybe just…oh…I don’t know. I really want to touch you, I feel terrible.”

“If you’re only touching because you think it’s not fair to me, then don’t do it, okay? I want you to do things because _you_ want to. I’ll be alright.”

Cas scrunched up his mouth. “Well,” he said with a deep breath, “Okay.”

“Here, just take this.” Dean stuck his little finger out. Cas moved a little closer to him and took his pinky with his own. He inhaled sharply, blushing, moaning almost at the touch. “How’s that?”

“It’s nice,” Cas cooed.

“Wanna keep walking?”

“Mmm,” Cas hummed in approval.

Little fingers together, they finished the circuit around the lake. Cas adjusted to it and seemed to be happier touching Dean. He was tired, though, and wanted to get home without dinner (as Dean originally had planned).

This started a long time of slow dates together. They returned to the lake every weekend for nearly two months, rounding the path and holding their little fingers together. Cas finally decided he wanted to hold Dean’s finger with his whole hand and after a while, that made him quite happy. The more they spent time together, the more Cas opened up. He began telling Dean all about his past—how his mother died when he was young, that he was a fussy kid who didn’t have many friends. Dean talked about his childhood, too, only he felt kind of bad that his was much nicer.

It so happened that one evening, when they were wrapping up dinner at a pho place, that Cas made a new request.

“I want you to come home with me,” he muttered beneath a soft, blue scarf. Winter was coming fast and the city was painted with Christmas colors.

“Now?”

“Yes,” Cas said, “I don’t want to be alone tonight. Can you stay over?”

“Sure.”

By now, Dean knew that staying over at Cas’ condo certainly wouldn’t include sex. If the only contact he had made in two months was holding single digits, getting laid would not happen overnight. Dean was okay with that. Of course he wanted to have sex with Cas and he liked to think eventually he would, but to his own surprise, he was really enjoying the time they spent together, with or without touching.

So they made it back to Cas’ condo. It was only the second time that Dean had been there but it wasn’t any different. Jupiter rounded his head out of the hallway like the last time, and disappeared just as quickly.

“Say hello to Dean,” Cas cooed at the cat. He took his boots and outer clothes off and left them on hooks around the front door. Dean did the same. “Would you like some Tea?”

“I’m good. Thanks, though.”

“If you don’t mind, I’m going to put the kettle on. There’s really nothing quite like peppermint tea in winter. Or summer, actually. In fact, it’s splendid any time of year.”

“Heheh, sure.”

Dean put his thumbs into his pants’ pockets and slowly walked around the living room. There was a whiteboard nailed to the outer wall of the kitchen, just to the left of the counter that opened the two rooms to each other. A long list of things was written in a very fine, possibly permanent marker. Cas had nice and neat handwriting.

_“I am overstimulated by: being touched too much (or touching too much), unfamiliar tastes and smells, loud noises, large crowds, too much information around me._

_“When I am overstimulated I can: close my eyes (or turn off the lights), concentrating on my breathing, leave the situation, play music (or hum to myself).”_

Dean tried not to stare at it too much. Cas’ head popped through the counter and smiled at him. “Are you alright?” he asked.

“Yeah, why?”

“Because you have been quiet. I’m not boring you, am I?”

“Nah, not at all.”

“Good, good. I’m nearly ready.”

Cas made himself a cup of tea and took it to the bedroom. To Dean’s surprise, he had a big, king sized bed that had many soft pillows and a brilliant coral colored comforter. There was one window in the room with black out curtains pulled open, several pretty paintings of mountains and lakes, and a small fish tank on his dresser. Jupiter was sitting there and watching the fish, likely something he did to keep himself occupied for most of the day.

“Nice bedroom,” Dean said, looking around with an impressed face.

“Thank you.”

Cas set his mug onto his nightstand with a coaster beneath it, then lightly sat down on his bed. “I think it might be nice to share my bed with you. Is that alright?”

“Yeah, I can dig it. But still no touching?”

“Just our fingers together. Will that be fine?”

“Totally, I understand.”

Dean pulled off his shirt and exposed his firm body, covered in many tattoos. Cas stared at him with his eyes wide open. “This okay?” Dean asked. Cas blushed furiously and turned away.

“I-I didn’t realize you were going to undress.”

“I don’t have to. I just, well, I usually sleep in my underwear, so…”

“Th-that’s fine. You can sleep h-however you’d like.”

“How ‘bout you turn the light off?”

“Yes, yes,” Cas agreed. He clapped his hands and the lamp on the nightstand went off. “I’m going to go to the bathroom and wash up. If you don’t mind, could you sit down so I don’t run into you?”

“Yeah, sure.”

The room had become incredibly dark so Dean had trouble finding the bed at first. “Okay, I’m sitting,” he said, once he safely found it. While Cas was in the bathroom, Dean got out of his pants and lay down in the bed. The pillows were very soft. It seemed they were stuffed with real feathers.

“Are you in bed?” Cas asked, the bathroom door opening with a bit of light. Dean managed to steal a glimpse of him in his undershirt and some kind of shorts before he flipped the switch off.

“Yeah.”

“I’ll join you.”

His feet shuffled across the floor and then the bed wiggled under his weight. A few clicks of a sound system near the bed and light piano music began to play. Cas slipped beneath the covers and curled up into his pillows. “Are you doing alright?” He asked Dean.

“Super. The bed is really comfy.”

“Thank you. I put considerable effort into making it that way.”

“I like it.”

“Mmm.”

Cas turned on his back and reached out for Dean’s hand, and upon finding it he took his pinky in his fist. “Thank you for being here, Dean.”

“You’re welcome. I like being here. I like being with you. You’re real special, you know that?”

Cas didn’t say anything but squeezed Dean’s finger more. He was blushing red hot and closed his eyes. Sleep consumed them both rather quickly.

* * *

At seven in the morning, the alarm on Dean’s phone went off. He didn’t hear it though, but Cas did. He got up carefully, clapped his light on then searched around the room for Dean’s pants. He turned off the alarm then stood for a moment and watched Dean sleep. During the night he must have rolled onto his side and taken one of the pillows into his arms. It was easier for Cas to observe him while he slept. Somehow that took much of the edge off.

But he couldn’t stand there forever. After a while of watching he decided to get on with his day, which started with taking the mug of tea (he had forgotten about that and left it half-full) into the kitchen. He turned the kettle on the make something stronger for the morning and he also preheated the oven. Jupiter the cat had been absent during the night, be he made an appearance when Cas was in the kitchen. Dean shortly followed, too.

“Mornin’,” he groaned with a yawn, stretching his bare torso tall. Cas looked quickly and blushed. “Sleep alright?”

“I did. And yourself?”

“Good.”

Dean took a couple steps into the kitchen and watched what Cas was doing. He had a box of frozen apple turnovers out and a pan to set them on. “Would you like one?” Cas asked, not looking away from the food.

“Sounds great. That’s awesome, thanks.”

“Of course. Do you have to work today?”

“Sure do.”

“When?”

“Eight-thirty, so I’ve got a little bit of time to kill. Breakfast at home seems like a good idea. You work today?”

“Mmhmm,” Cas hummed. “Oh, do you want one or two?”

“I’ll have two if ya don’t mind.”

“Not at all.”

He put three turnovers onto the pan then stuck them in the oven and set a timer. “Fifteen minutes,” he announced before turning to face Dean. His eyes scanned him quickly.

“You okay?” Dean asked, leaning against one of the counters.

“Your body…”

“Yeah?”

“ _It’s nice_ …” Cas held his hands over his face.

“Thanks, Cas.” Dean chuckled at how shy he looked. “You don’t have to be so modest. Shit, if you knew everything in my head you wouldn’t have to feel like that at all.”

“What do you mean?” Cas asked, peeking over his fingers like a child.

“I think about you a lot,” Dean admitted. He got a bit shy now, too. “So if I look good to you or something, the feeling’s mutual and you don’t have ta’ worry.”

“Alright…Dean?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m working until seven this evening, but—if you don’t mind—I would really love it if you joined me here again.”

Dean smiled. “I’d love to.”

“I’ll make you dinner this time, how does that sound?”

“ _Awesome_.”

They enjoyed the turnovers together, which were utterly lovely, then Dean dressed and was on his way. Thinking about having dinner at Cas’ was exciting—so much that he had great difficulty focusing at work. Bobby wondered what was giving him that spring in his step and Gabe pointed out that it was probably a woman. Dean didn’t say anything, though. He didn’t need to flaunt what he had.

Eight o’clock rolled around and that was when Dean was told to arrive. He went into the building, took the elevator up to the ninth floor and knocked on #906. This evening was considered to be a special day, so Dean made sure to freshen up real nice and wear a dress shirt (this one was black) instead of the usual plaid. Also, he swung by the grocer’s and picked up a bouquet of fluffy pink asters.

Cas opened the door and smiled when he saw Dean standing there, hands behind his back. Cas had on a white apron with black polka-dots, underneath which looked like a short sleeved, lavender button-up. The strong, sweet smell of bread baking wafted from the open door.

“Dean,” Cas cooed, looking elated, “Come in.”

They stepped back into the condo and Cas closed the door, only to turn around and see the asters outstretched in Dean’s hand.

“Oh!”

“For you.”

“Oh, my!”

Cas blushed furiously as he took the flowers from Dean, careful not to touch his hand. He held them to his face and inhaled slowly. “Ohh, Dean…”

“Like ‘em?”

“They’re beautiful.”

“Just like you.”

“Thank you…I’ll put them in some water.”

Cas rushed off to the kitchen to grab a little vase, which he filled at the tap then bunged the flowers into. “They will make a good centerpiece as well,” he said, smiling as he took them to the tiny dining room table. It was already set for two, with pretty china dishes that had blue and silver patterns around the edges. Dean casually walked through and noticed Jupiter sitting on one of the chairs, tail flickering and eyes focused on him. Pretty classical music was playing in the kitchen.

“Take a seat, Dean,” Cas said. “Would you like a beer? I bought some just for you.”

“Seriously?” Dean asked as he pulled out the empty chair and sat down. “That’s…that’s real nice of you, Cas.”

“I wanted this to be special for you.”

“It’s special no matter what.”

Cas came back into the dining room with a tall glass and a cold, domestic beer. It was already open and he put both in front of Dean’s plate. “Here you are,” Cas said with a cute smile. Dean realized that it was easy for Cas to enjoy himself in moments like these because he was in control. He cooked the dinner, he adjusted the music, he set the table, he modified the lighting and he invited Dean.

“So what’re we having?” Dean asked, pouring the beer into his glass. This was better than any restaurant he had ever been to.

“Here,” Cas said. He returned with a small platter. “This is chicken parmesan. I hope you like it.”

Dean’s eyes widened at the succulent pieces of chicken breast. They were dazzling, covered in cheese and breading while sitting in a shallow bath of tomato sauce. Cas popped back into the kitchen and brought out a salad, too (Dean had some of that just to be nice, even though fresh vegetables really weren’t his thing).

“This is great, Cas,” Dean said as he began to eat. “You’re a really good cook, y’know that?”

Cas looked flattered. “I have this recipe book that uses only six ingredients to each dish. That’s easy for me and I don’t get overwhelmed.”

“Sounds perfect for you,” Dean grinned. He took another sip of his beer and sighed contentedly. Being funny, he chuckled and remarked, “I should come over more often.”

Cas stared at Dean very seriously. “You should,” he said. “I would love that.”

“Cas, I was…” Dean’s voice trailed off as he looked back at him. Those big, pretty blue eyes were wiggling with a sort of desperation, as if he were to say, “ _I need you here.”_

“Y-yeah, I can come by more.”

Cas blushed. “That would be wonderful.”

Dinner was wrapping up and Cas began to clean the dishes away. Dean argued to let him help, but Cas insisted that he stay there and have another beer. He also apologized for not having any dessert, but he would make it up to him another time.

“There’s something I want to do tonight,” Cas said, rubbing a sponge across the now-empty table.

“What’s that?”

“I-I’ll tell you. Are you ready for bed?”

Dean checked his phone and saw that it was just a little after nine. “I could stay up later.”

“We can stay up, I just, I, well, I was wondering if you wanted to head to the bedroom now?” Cas got a little flustered as he spoke and went off into the kitchen quickly. Dean raised an eyebrow.

“ _Sure_.”

Once Cas was done, he turned off the music and all of lights then moved to his bedroom. He clapped the lamp on then sat on the bed, shortly followed by Jupiter, who still seemed skeptical of Dean but was slowly getting closer.

“So what did you wanna do?” Dean asked. He was still standing and taking note that there wasn’t a single television in the condo. The music systems, however, seemed to be linked to each other and that was pretty cool. Cas sat on the bed and petted Jupiter casually, watching the cat and not Dean.

“I would like to lay in bed with you.”

“Um. Okay.”

Cas held his breath momentarily. “Naked,” he added.

“ _Oh_ ,” Dean said with a slow nod. “You sure?”

“Yes…”

“Well, alright then.”

He tried to remain calm but inside he was ecstatic to finally see Cas naked. He unbuttoned his shirt and watched Cas, who got up from the bed and turned away from his as he undressed. Dean got naked quickly but Cas took his time; he pulled out of the shirt and laid it over the nightstand, then slipped off the undershirt he was wearing. Dean stared at his back muscles which were surprisingly toned. He wondered how Cas managed to work out with all of his sensitivity.

“Are you…” Cas muttered, looking over his shoulder. He quickly caught a glimpse of Dean’s naked body then flicked his head around again. Yes, yes, Dean was just as hot as he expected, but he didn’t anticipate a dick that big. Even flaccid it looked quite impressive. He hadn’t noticed before.

“I’m not gonna do anything until you give me to clear to do it, okay?” Dean said, lightly thumbing over his thickening cock. Cas said “okay” then undid his fly. He dropped his pants to a puddle on the floor, showing baby blue briefs to Dean then leaned down to grab them. Dean’s heart pumped fast. It was funny because he had been with a bunch of men before Cas, yet this instance of watching him undress was the most nerve-tingling cock teasing he had ever experienced. He liked it.

“I’m going to take my underwear off,” Cas said, almost like a kid that needed permission. He put his thumbs into the elastic on either side and looked back at Dean again, trying to focus only on his face.

“That’s fine,” said Dean, trying desperately not to grin like a pervert. Cas had the most perfect ass even in briefs, so seeing it bare must be even better.

“Promise to laugh?”

“What? Why would I laugh?”

“Because I look strange naked.”

“You look _amazing_ , naked or not. From this angle I can’t imagine anybody else I’d rather be with.”

Cas flushed red hot. “Do you mean that?” he asked. Those thumbs in his underwear were driving Dean crazy. It was hard to retain sanity.

“Yeah, ‘course I do,” he said, trying to sound calm.

“And my voice?”

“What about it?”

“Is it too low?”

“No, not at all. Why would you think that?”

“I absolutely hate my voice.”

“Why?!”

“It’s so deep and gravelly. It doesn’t suit me.”

“Hey, my voice is deep and gravelly, too.”

“But it suits you. You’re very intense and masculine.”

“Heh, Cas, look; you have a great body. It’s pretty but also very male. If I want someone girly, I hook up with a girl.”

Cas stared at Dean and blinked a few times, still keeping his back to him and his thumbs in the elastic. They tugged down just a bit but not enough to show anything else. “Would you?” he asked in a soft, scared voice. Dean nodded. “So you’re…”

“Bi, yeah. Is that okay?”

Cas shook his head positively. “I’m in no position to judge anyone’s preferences, am I?”

“Guess not.”

Finally, Cas gave a tiny smile, mouthed the word “okay” and slowly pulled his underwear down. The perfect, smooth and round ass that almost bounced out of the briefs made Dean’s semi grow full on hard. He bit his lower lip as Cas straightened up and turned around. His cock couldn’t compare to Dean’s but that was alright, most guys couldn’t. Either way it was nicely shaped, surrounded by freshly shaven flesh and a relatively small scrotum. Dean couldn’t understand how Cas felt bad about all of that, but when he considered how his balls were like eggs that swung around beneath the gigantic sausage, blanketed with carefully trimmed hair he maybe understood.

Cas looked him over then turned away and got into the bed. He seemed to be increasingly nervous. “Yu okay?” Dean asked.

“Y-yes,” Cas replied in a tiny voice. Dean decided to get under the covers on the other side.

“What do you wanna do?”

“I’m not sure…”

“You just wanted to get naked together?” Cas nodded. “Well you look great. Your body is fucking perfect. D’you feel better now?”

“A bit…” Cas took a deep breath and closed his eyes. They both were on their backs, looking to the ceiling as the fish tank bubbled softly in the background. Dean wanted to jerk off so bad, or have Cas touch him or _something_ but her dare not even ask. He looked over and Cas and smiled, trying to make things better, but Cas still had his eyes shut and he began to hum.

“What are you singing?” Dean asked.

“ _Moon River_.”

“Oh, yeah? Any reason?”

“It’s my grounding song. I think about it when I try to equate overstimulation with happiness.”

Dean furrowed his brow. “What d’you mean?”

“My mother used to sing it to me when I was little. It’s one of the only concrete memories I have of her. As I said before, I was a fussy child and didn’t much enjoy being held. They didn’t realize that, so when I cried she would hold me, only to make it worse. But, she would sing _Moon River_ and that calmed me down, despite having her hands all over me.”

“That’s sweet,” Dean said, trying to calm Cas down as well. “So tell me, what’s over stimulating you right now?”

“Umm,” Cas opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling. “Knowing that you have seen me nude, and then seeing you nude. And, I, well, I would like to touch you very much but I’m scared to.”

“What’s bad about seeing me naked?”

“It’s a lot for me to take it. I know that must sound silly.”

“Nah, I get it. That’s fine. No worries. But what can we do to make this better?”

Cas smiled shyly. He eyed Dean just briefly before looking to the ceiling again. His voice grew soft and he suggested, “tell me what you want to do with me…”

“What I _want_ to do?”

“Yes, exactly.”

“Oh, wow. You want honesty?”

“Yes…”

“Jeez, okay.” Dean took a deep breath and looked at the ceiling, too. He closed his eyes and thought about Cas beneath those covers. He wet his lips and began to describe his fantasies as such; “I wanna touch you all over. Run my hands down your chest, your hips, your legs…and I wanna kiss you everywhere, too. Wanna lick your body real good and slow.”

Cas gasped softly and hummed, “oh, my.”

“I want you to sit on my face so I can eat you out for a long, long time. You ever been rimmed?”

“N-no…”

“No? Never?”

“No…is that bad?”

“I’m just surprised. Maybe it’s too much for you.” Dean peeked his eyes open and looked at Cas, who was flushed red in the face and licking his lips over and over, eyes still closed tightly. “Keep telling me,” Cas moaned.

“Alright, well,” Dean continued, this time watching Cas’ face. “I’d kiss your hole over and over, then open my lips and fuck you with my tongue.”

“Oh, gosh,” Cas gasped, forehead scrunching up. His body tensed and Dean saw the blanket tenting slightly by his crotch.

“I’d slide my tongue in and out of you, getting you all ready for my dick. Yeah…that’d be awesome…then I would put you on your hands and knees and just rub my cock along your crack for a while.”

“Goodness!” Cas moaned. He twitched a couple times.

“Then, once you were lubed up real good,” Dean’s voice grew increasingly heavy, his breath so hard that it nearly choked him. His cock was so hungry, too. “I’d hold your hips and push my dick inside your dirty little hole.”

“Aah, my! Oh, goodness!” Cas yelped, his head turning side to side.

“Oh, Jesus, Cas,” Dean groaned. “Do you—uh—do you mind if I jerk myself off?”

“Th-that’s fine!” Cas shouted. His body convulsed wickedly and he let tiny moans flutter from his mouth. “Oh, goodness…goodness!”

“Are you okay?” Dean asked, taking his own cock in his fist and jerking it quickly. What a relief!

“D-Dean, I had no idea what you thought about doing with me,” Cas gasped. His eyes opened and looked to Dean, whose covers were moving violently as he pleasured himself. His lips were parted and his tongue licked out of them, which Cas couldn’t stop staring at. “Oh, Dean!”

“You wanna take the covers off? Wanna watch me?”

Cas nodded very slowly, looking embarrassed.

“No reason to be shy, Cas. It’s natural, it’s beautiful. You’re attracted to me and—oh, God—I’m attracted to you.”

“Y-yes…”

“I’m gonna pull the covers down, just over me, okay? And if you—aww, yeah—if you wanna show me your body, you can do that, okay?”

“Yes…”

Dean brought the blanket down to reveal his nakedness. He had his fist locked around the base of his cock and pumped it quickly, precum dribbling down the shift wickedly. Cas caught sight of it and moaned loudly.

“MY!” he shouted. “Dean!” His body arched and he gasped very loud. “Aaah!” Cheeks red hot, he panted and grasped at the sheets. Dean could only guess what just happened, and his climax was approaching as well. He rubbed his cock hard then closed his eyes, biting his lower lip as ribbons of cream shot out onto his inked stomach. But Cas wasn’t looking. He was twitching and panting, trying to gain a grip on everything around him.

“C-Cas,” Dean moaned. “You okay?”

Cas, coming around now but clearly more embarrassed than ever, put his hands over his face and muttered, “ _I orgasmed_.”

“Just like that? Without any hands?”

“Y-yes…”

“Yo, Cas, that’s _amazing._ I dunno why you’re so embarrassed. You know how many people would love to be able to get off without doing anything? Just with the power of suggestion?”

Cas shook his head. “It’s always been so awkward for me…”

“It’s fucking hot. Can I see?”

Cas looked at Dean through tired, narrow eyes. He glanced at the cum on Dean’s stomach then slowly pulled the covers down from himself, too. To Dean’s surprise, Cas still had a boner, but it had leaked jizz all over himself. Dean looked at it hungrily. “You’re still hard?”

“Y-yes…”

“Do you wanna cum again?”

Cas shrunk into himself a little and blushed even more (if that was possible). “Yes…”

“Want me to touch you?”

“No!” Cas groaned. “Please, no. I’m not…well…oh…I…” He looked at Dean’s face and wet his lips. “I would so much love to kiss you.”

Dean smiled, feeling his eyes crease a little. “Then kiss me.”

“Is that alright?”

“Cas, you just watched me jerk off. I think anything’s alright, yeah?”

“That’s true,” Cas said with a shy chuckle. He straightened his face out then leaned over to Dean very slowly, lips puckered, then pressed them together in the most chaste of way. Dean closed his eyes at the kiss and smiled happily. “There, wasn’t so bad, right?” he said. Cas stared at him with glassy eyes. He moved in and kissed him again. “I think you just need to feel comfortable enough with someone, then you’ll be fine.”

“Do you think so?”

“Sure. These other boyfriends of yours, you had sex, right?” Cas nodded. “And you couldn’t’ve been cumming every time they touched you, right?”

“Nearly.”

“Seriously?”

“I would have usually have eight, nine or time orgasms each time we had sex.”

“Holy shit!” Dean exclaimed. “That’s incredible!”

“It was exhausting.”

“Sorry, but, but still! Damn. I wish I could have that many.”

“No, no you don’t.”

“Why not? What’s wrong with it?”

Cas retracted to his side again and folded his arms. “It’s terribly exhausting.”

“And? Sex is supposed to make you tired. Don’t you like cumming?”

“I suppose.”

“You’ve got to. Just relax a little, Cas. Enjoy the orgasms. They’re awesome. Relax and have as many as you want—you look so sexy when you cum, anyway.”

Cas’ eyebrows raised. “I do?” he asked.

“Oh, man. So sexy…”

“Dean…”

“Yeah?”

“Would you…would you touch me? Very gently.”

“Where?”

“Anywhere. Very gently, though, very gently.”

“Sure.”

Dean turned on his side and put his hand out towards Cas’ body. He focused intently and let his fingertips just barely skim across Cas’ bicep.

“Ohh…” Cas closed his eyes and moaned loudly. He licked his lips and started to thrust his hips. “Oh, Dean…”

“Is this good?” Dean asked, running the very tip of his pads along Cas’ collarbone.

“Oooh…”

“I’ll take that as a yes.”

He traced a line back and forth over Cas’ chest, taking his time and making sure not to apply much pressure at all. It surprised him that the delicate touching didn’t tickle Cas at all, since it would certainly have given _him_ the giggles. He took his finger lower now and ran it over Cas’ tight, taught nipple.

“Ooh!” Cas squealed. His cock throbbed and dripped precum all on its own. Dean watched it and bit his lower lip. Cas’ body was red hot and even starting to sweat now, so he tickled his index finger over the tiny nipple bud and made Cas squirm and throb more. Then he took his thumb and softly squeezed it.

“AAAH!” Cas shouted, He tensed up and shot another thick load out, gripping the shits and trembling all over.

“Shh, shh,” Dean cooed. “Enjoy the orgasm. Feels good, right?”

Cas gasped, eyes open now and staring at the ceiling. His hips rocked forward on their own and his mouth was forced open.

“Good?” Dean asked. Cas relaxed and smiled. “Good,” he moaned.

“Mmm…that’s what I wanna hear…”

“Kiss me, Dean.”

Dean leaned over Cas and put a tiny, chaste kiss on his lips. Cas held his breath then sighed once he was done.

“Feeling okay?” Dean asked.

“Tired.”

“Go to sleep, Cas.”

“I will. Thank you, Dean.”

“Don’t thank me.”

“Very well…good night.”

“Night.”

Dean watched Cas drift off to sleep, which happened very, very fast, then jerked himself off again before passing out as well.

* * *

Cas slept so deeply that Dean’s alarm didn’t even bother him, even after it took over a minute of beeping for Dean to notice it. He rolled out of bed groggily and shut the noise off, then got up, did a stretch and clapped that lamp on. Cas didn’t stir. He was still on his back, head slightly to the side with his mouth open. Snores came out softly. Dean couldn’t resist the urge to lean over and sneak a peek underneath the covers at Cas’ body. His flaccid cock was gracefully flopped over to the side, looking just as beautiful as ever in the lamplight. Dean wanted to touch, but he promised he wouldn’t without permission and he took that seriously.

With Cas still asleep, Dean washed and dressed in the bathroom as noiselessly as possible, but when it came time for him to leave for work, he thought it’d be polite to at least and wake him up to say goodbye.

“Cas…”

Dean squat down by the bed and put his face close to Cas’. It was harder to wake someone up without touching than he realized.

“ _Cas_ …”

Jupiter had come up by Dean’s feet and started to meow. When Dean extended a hand to try and pet the cat, he bolted, and Cas started to come around.

“Aah…Dean?”

“Hey…I gotta go to work.”

“Oh, right…will you…be back tonight?”

“Sure. When’d your shift up?”

“Eight…”

“Yeah I’ll come back. Like when, eight thirty?” Cas nodded. “Is that too late for dinner?” He shook his head.

“I’ll make something for you…”

Dean flashed a thankful grin. “Sounds good. I’ll be back.”

“Dean…”

“Yeah?”

“Kiss me…”

“Alright.”

Dean pressed his lips to Cas’ softly and Cas made a little moan. “That good?” Dean asked, just an inch or so away from the mouth.

Cas’ eyes were heavily hooded and blinked slowly, staring at Dean. He nodded then said, “I love you.”

Dean froze. His expression fell blank. He wasn’t sure what to say, even though he’d been telling himself for a while now that Cas would likely use those words. In a careless haste, Dean got to his feet, scratched his head and muttered, “I-I’ll be back tonight.” Cas, apparently too tired to be paying much attention, just smiled and closed his eyes.

It wasn’t that Dean _didn’t_ love him back, he just didn’t know how to respond to such a thing. Nobody outside of his family had used that word before and he had never used it either. As he walked out of Cas’ condo, Jupiter watching his moves carefully, Dean took a deep breath and tried to reorganize his thoughts. _Next time_ , he told himself _. Next time he says it, I’ll tell him the same thing. Maybe he won’t even remember this morning_.

Evidently, Dean’s assumption proved to be true since Cas didn’t bring it up at all when he returned that evening. There was a tuna casserole that just came from the oven sitting on the table, along with a salad and the usual beer for Dean.

“Looks great, Cas, thanks.”

“You’re certainly welcome.”

They took their seats at the table and began to eat. Cas happily looked over at Dean every now and then, but then his face sunk and he dropped his fork to his plate. Dean snapped his vision over to him. “You okay?” he asked.

“Oh, Dean,” Cas sighed heavily.

“What’s wrong?”

Cas pressed his lips together for a second then turned his eyes to Dean, heavy and sullen so quickly. “I’ll never have the sex life that I _want_.”

Dean furrowed his brow. “What d’you mean?”

“Oh, see, ahh, this sounds silly…”

“No, no, go ahead. I’m sure it won’t sound silly or anything. You know you can trust me.”

Cas smiled. “That’s true,” he said with a short nod. He looked back to his plate and took his fork up again. “Being with you is freeing, knowing that I can be myself, but I’m also slightly conflicted as I’ve never experienced such a relaxed environment.”

“It’s okay,” Dean cooed. “You take your time and tell me whatever you want, whenever you feel like it, okay?”

“Yes…”

He had another bite of casserole and chewed it slowly. Dean continued drinking his second beer.

“You know,” Cas finally kept talking after he swallowed. His expression was impossible to determine. “I’ve observed a good amount of pornography.”

Dean almost choked. “Huh?”

“Pornographic movies. You must know what I’m talking about, right?”

“Well yeah, sure. I watch a ton of porn, too.” Dean’s cheeks flushed a bit but he kept eating, watching Cas as he finished his food and proceeded to casually run his finger around the rim of his water glass.

“Because of my sensitivity, all of these scenarios I’ve seen played out won’t ever happen to me.”

“Y-you don’t know that. What sorta ‘scenarios’ do you like?” Dean almost hesitated to ask this, realizing that Cas might tell him things he didn’t want to know, or perhaps give more of a spicy tease to his already hot fantasies. But Cas huddled into his little bubble a bit more and looked up at the ceiling. Jupiter had come around and jumped into his lap, which prompted Cas to pet him.

“I’ve always wanted to be tied up…”

Cas said this so nonchalantly that Dean nearly flung himself from the table. He had to make sure he didn’t choke on his last gulp of beer. All he could think about now was a nude Cas, bound to his bed and fidgeting for mercy as Dean plowed him good.

“I wish I could be spanked…”

This didn’t help. Dean’s pants started to tent and his whole body felt a hot tingle pulse through it. Cas had put his chin on his hand, still stroking Jupiter with the other and his eyes unmoved from the ceiling.

“I would love to have sex in public…”

“OKAY!”

Dean had to stop him. He slammed his palms down on the table, glaring at Cas almost _desperately_ as his face grew bright red. Cas jumped and looked like he had been caught doing something wrong.

“Sorry, I’m sorry…it’s just…” Dean shook his head. He put both index fingers to his temples and rubbed firmly.

“I don’t understand,” Cas muttered.

“Not your fault,” Dean continued with a sigh. “It’s just, ugh, well, you come off so innocent that it caught me by surprise.”

“Innocent?” Cas asked, cocking his head. He acted as if he didn’t know what the word even meant. “How?”

Dean sat back in his chair and attempted to gather his thoughts. “You’re shy. Stuff makes you blush easily. Y’know, talking about sex, seeing me naked...guess I thought you’d be too shy or awkward to watch porn and have fantasies like that.”

“No, not at all,” Cas told him. Jupiter mewed a few times as a signal that he wasn’t being petted enough. “I have flights of fancy, too. My issue is connecting them with real life, with my sensitivity. I get embarrassed when I have to face these things. For instance, if I saw pictures of you naked it wouldn’t be such a problem, but to be there and see it, knowing that I _could_ touch you but I would be too overstimulated; that is where the difficulty arises.”

“Okay,” Dean said, nodding a few times. “I get it.”

Before he could say anything else, Cas nudged the cat off of his lap and stood up. “Dean, let me show you something, since we’re already on the topic of embarrassment and sharing emotions.”

“Uhh, sure?”

Dean followed Cas to the bedroom where he pointed out his laptop on the small desk. Cas sat down and turned it on.

“What’s on there?” Dean asked.

“I’ll show you, give me a moment.”

After the computer booted up (no doubt with the manufacturer’s standard settings and wallpaper), Cas went to a folder and opened a video. He grew terribly embarrassed all of the sudden and looked as though he were on the verge of tears.

“Cas? Y’know you don’t have to show me anything.”

“No, no, this is a barrier I need to cross with you. And I trust you enough.”

“Um, okay. So what is it?”

Cas cleared his throat. “This is a video of me and my last partner making love.”

“ _Oh_ ,” Dean said. “That’s what, aah, that’s what started that whole embarrassed problem, huh?”

Cas said nothing and nodded.

“If you want me to watch it, I will.”

“I do.”

He hit play and the video began to roll. It was shot from the ex-boyfriend’s point of view, with a rather shaky hand. Cas was on his back and considerably younger. His hair was a little longer but his face was just as adorable. He was completely naked and sprawled out into a couple black pillows. The ex-boyfriend kept the camera right to Cas, who was looking away, and he said, “ _Hey, babe, look here. Say hi.”_ By the sound of him, he was considerably older.

 _“Um,_ ” Cas’ voice, just as gravelly as ever, quivered and replied, “ _H-hello_.”

“ _Lookin’ sexy for your big screen debut, I see_.”

Cas blushed and looked to the lens briefly. “ _I suppose_.”

The Cas in real life had recoiled a bit, both of his hands over his face. He stood up and offered Dean the chair instead, which he happily took. Cas still watched the monitor but at a distance.

 _“You wanna tell me what you were just doing?_ ” the ex-boyfriend asked. Cas hesitated.

“ _I was fingering myself_ ,” he said. The camera shook with pleasant laughter.

“ _Getting all nice and ready for me?_ ”

“ _Yes_.”

The camera began to pan down, crawling over Cas’ smooth body and stopped at his crotch. Dean swallowed stiffly when he saw Cas’ smooth-shaven pubic area, a firm boner atop tight balls, not to mention the most beautiful asshole he had ever seen. “Good lord,” Dean gasped to himself.

The ex-boyfriend’s hand came into view and he lightly touched Cas’ hole, causing him to contract greatly. He yelped and the ex said, “ _Looks hot, babe. Real good. Nice and loose._ ”

“ _Y-yes…”_

“ _You ready?”_

_“Mmm.”_

The camera shifted slightly and then a hard cock came into view. It wasn’t nearly as big as Dean’s, and once he saw the hand that held it, he knew for sure that the guy was much, _much_ older than Cas was. Old enough to be creepy.

“ _Alrighty, here we go_.”

His cockhead touched Cas’ hole and he yelped again. The ex moaned deeply as he began to stretch it. “ _Now don’t cum ‘til I say so, right?_ ”

“ _Right…_ ”

The video Cas didn’t seem overly confident in his agreeing. His partner worked his cock into him more and the camera panned up to see Cas’ face again, just briefly. He was gasping and blushing hard, wincing, trying not to explode. The camera went back to their genitals again and the ex-boyfriend began pumping his cock in and out, just about an inch or so.

“ _Oh, my,”_ Cas gasped. His legs trembled. What Dean found interesting was how the ex wasn’t touching Cas at all, save for his cock. Were they close enough to fuck but not enough to make much skin-to-skin contact?

“ _You look sexy, babe.”_

_“Ooh…”_

He went deeper and pounded a little harder. Dean’s pants were about to burst open; he was on the edge of his seat. Teenage Cas was so hot, so tender and young. Or perhaps it was just the asshole he was looking at? Maybe it had nothing to do with the age.

“ _Ooh, my!_ ” the video Cas yelled. He trembled and came all over himself. The ex-boyfriend grunted dissatisfied.

“ _I said don’t, babe, come on…”_

_“I c-can’t help it.”_

He fucked Cas harder. He went in all the way. Cas shouted and shrieked, grappling at himself as he came again and again. Dean was leaking precum into his boxerbriefs and almost slobbering all over the keyboard. Real life Cas was swaying on his heels, hands still clapped over his face.

“ _If you can’t—hng—exercise patience_ ,” the ex-boyfriend grunted. “ _Then—aah—you’ll have to submit!_ ”

 _“Aah! T-too much!”_ Cas yelped.

Dean counted six orgasms and then the ex had his. He let out a rather unattractive grunt then slowed, the camera shaking immensely. “ _Got a big fat load for you_ ,” he growled. The camera focus on Cas’ hole as his slipped his cock out. “ _Show me the goods_.” Cas pushed a bit and a cascade of hot cum came flowing out. How did this guy never rim Cas? The hole looked so good, Dean wanted to lick the screen.

“ _You look a mess. Get yourself cleaned up.”_

_“Y-yes. You felt very go—“_

The video clip ended before Cas could finish talking. Dean sat there in awe, staring still at the stand-by screen. He could have sword sweat was building up on his forehead.

“Cas,” Dean said, trying to get words on. Cas’ hand took over the computer and logged it off.

“I’m sorry,” Cas apologized quickly.

“What? Why are you sorry?” Dean got out of the chair, walking funny with the boner he had and began to unzip his pants. Relief.

“I was ugly.”

“What?!” Dean gasped. He dropped his pants to the floor and stared at Cas, who was blushing furiously. “You weren’t ugly! That was HOT! But your dude wasn’t very nice to you.”

“Not exactly, but that was normal.”

Dean sighed. “Jeez,” he began, “I really wish I could hug you, Cas, ‘cause that made me sad. He should’ve enjoyed every orgasm you had. No wonder you’re shy about it.”

Cas didn’t answer. He started to undress. “That’s why I’m with you,” he finally said, and Dean smiled. He peeled off his shirt and got into bed, underwear pounding with the spot of dampness on the front. Cas got completely naked and sat on his side, putting his pretty, toned back towards Dean. Oh, how he wanted to stroke it.

“So he never tied you up?” Dean asked.

“No, I wasn’t aware of that being a ‘thing’ back then. But that’s for the better, anyway. I can’t handle that.”

“Who says you can’t?” Dean turned on his side and began to stroke himself through his underwear.

“My nerves, of course.”

“Hey, look—if you could work it up to have his dick go inside you, I bet you can work it up to be touched all over.”

“I’m not sure,” Cas said with a heavy sigh.

“Alright, how ‘bout we don’t worry about this right now, huh?” Cas nodded. “You wanna get some sleep?”

“Do you want to masturbate first?”

“Together?”

Cas laid on the bed finally and pushed the covers down. He glanced over at Dean. “Of course.”

“Sounds awesome.”

Dean peeled his boxer briefs down and revealed his hungry boner. He began to stroke it and Cas watched, biting his lower lip.

“So you finger yourself?” Dean asked.

“Sometimes…”

“Feel good?”

“Oh yes, of course. Anal penetration is very nice.”

“You uh,” Dean grinned sheepishly, rubbing just the head of his cock within his fist. “You wanna show me?”

“I suppose,” Cas agreed with a tiny smile. He turned to his nightstand and took out a bottle of _sensitive solution_ lubricant. It appeared to be mostly untouched. Dean watched like a vulture as Cas tipped some sticky lube onto his finger. He gasped to himself, likely from the coldness of the liquid, and began to rub it between his fingers. Dean watched as Cas grew hard just from that feeling alone. He rubbed himself faster.

Carefully, Cas got on his knees and then faced Dean. He leaned and reached back with hand to spread his cheek, showing that beautiful hole to Dean. It was even better in person, six years later or not. Dean felt he would cum soon.

“Is this alright?” Cas asked.

“Shit—it’s—oh God your asshole is amazing!”

“Ohh,” Cas hummed.

He put his other hand back there and lightly touched his rim, immediately moaned and writhing a bit. Dean jerked so fast he thought he might explode. Cas’ finger dipped within himself and he immediately began to cum, shouting a lovely, low scream. “Oh, Gosh!” he yelled.

Dean’s eyes followed Cas’ cum as he dribbled onto the sheets. He arched his back and shot his own load out over his firm body, shouting in deep pleasure. “Caaas!”

Cas tried to look back but he was overcome with more sensations as he continued to finger himself. He was actually happy to be cumming, happy to be exploring himself in front of such a caring partner. He pushed the finger in deeper and came once more, yelping and nipping at the sheets he was diving against.

“Ohh!”

Then he collapsed. They both did.

“Awesome.”

“Dean?”

Cas took his usual place, laying on his back next to Dean and looked over at him, smiling through his gasps.

“Y-yeah?”

“Kiss me.”

Dean grinned and leaned over to give Cas a quick kiss on the lips. He moved back but Cas seemed to want more. They held their lips together and moaned gently against them for a moment. Cas fidgeted a little.

“How’s that?” Dean asked.

“Lovely…can I hold your hand?”

“Yeah, ‘course.”

Dean extended his hand to Cas and Cas slipped his fingers between them. They pressed their palms together, resting on the mattress. Their fingers entwined. Cas seemed to be delighted. They fell silent for a while, minutes, possibly fifteen or so. The afterglow was incredible. Cas felt more connected to Dean than ever.

“Dean?” he asked in a tiny whisper.

“I know what you’re gonna say,” Dean said.

“You do?”

“Yeah. And I love you, too.”

He looked at Cas to give him a wink, but Cas’ eyes were shut. He had a great big smile on his face, stuck between his rosy cheeks. Dean gave those fingers a little squeeze and welcomed sleep to the bed.

* * *

Dean was practically living with Cas at that point. It had not been discussed in the slightest, but Cas made him his own set of keys to get in and they both assumed they’d be together in the evenings. It was a gradual transition, but for someone like Cas, that was necessary. Dean didn’t mind. He could tell was Cas needed and he silently obliged. He did, however, have to bring a TV in, because he couldn’t tolerate that much emptiness.

The most exciting aspect of their relationship’s progression, to Dean, was that how they were starting to touch each other. He looked at Cas’ development as a real success. He was adapting to regular kisses and handholding, showing off his body for Dean and even having some fun with being dirty. Cas was enjoying being naked around the house, which surprised Dean since at first he was so bashful about it. Obviously he was so comfortable with Dean that he was able to express himself in ways that certain shyness had prevented before.

Sometimes they would sit on the sofa while Dean watched the TV and Cas would finger himself for him (definitely more interesting than any program), or dinner might be interrupted by Cas’ need to jerk off. Their nature walks, though, were always a breath of fresh air from both the city and their sex life. But nothing could beat lying in bed together after mutual masturbation (what they were calling sex). Both on their backs, the two men held hands and displayed great, tired smiles.

“Oh, Dean,” Cas said softly.

“Hmm?”

“That was lovely.”

Dean squeezed the hand in his. “Yeah, it was,” he said.

“I really…”

“What?”

Cas tipped his head towards Dean and looked at him shyly. It was almost a pity that they had made it so far and yet Cas was still considerably shy.

“I really wish to be held me,” Cas admitted in a hushed voice. Dean smiled more.

“Like my arms around you?”

“Yes…”

“We can try.”

“A-alright.”

Dean released Cas’ hand then turned onto his side. He slowly put his arm out over his partner’s chest then lowered it and hugged him. Cas heated up and fidgeted. “No, no!” he yelped. Dean retracted immediately.

“Too much?”

Looking rather upset, Cas nodded profusely and agreed. “I’m sorry!”

“Don’t be sorry, I guess you just aren’t ready. It’s not your fault.”

“This is so tiring!!”

Cas slammed himself into the bed out of frustration, beating his fists lightly onto the mattress. Dean was concerned but he also took note of the pillows. Yes, yes—Cas’ pillows were stuffed with feathers and one of them was poking out of the side slightly. Dean narrowed his eyes, wet his lips and nodded to himself over his idea.

“Hold on,” he said, reaching over to the pillow and pulling the little tip of the feather out. It slipped out and fanned into a fluffy thing, about two inches long.

“What are you doing?” Cas asked, looking up at Dean’s movement.

“Let’s try this.”

He held the tip gently and brushed it over Cas’ arm, tickling the damp skin. Cas closed his eyes and smiled contently. “Ah…”

“How’s that feel?”

“Nice…”

“Good,” Dean grinned.

The feather tickled down Cas’ arm and to his hand, all the way back up and to his collar bone. He flicked it over his nipples, in tight circles and around his pecs. Cas hummed and grinned, taking slow breaths and looking quite delighted. “ _Dean_ …”

“Like it?”

“Ahh…”

Dean brushed the fluffy feather over Cas’ abdomen. He tickled it back and forth, across the taught muscle and to his pubic area. Cas was enjoying himself but he wasn’t getting hard.

“This is good, huh?” Dean asked.

“Mmm…so nice…”

Now Dean crawled down to the end of the bed, flicking the feather over Cas’ legs, knees, and to his feet where he stopped and wiggled it over his soles. Each leg got equal attention and Cas was quite happy. When he was done there, Dean came back up to Cas’ side and lay down, still tickling his sternum with the feather.

“So you _can_ be touched, not very hard.”

“I suppose. I’ve never tried using a feather before.”

Dean smirked as he trailed the fluff up to Cas’ collar bone again, then leaned over and gave him a quick kiss on the lips. “How about being tied up and tickled with the feather?” he asked.

“ _Oh!_ ” Cas inhaled, blushing. “P-possibly!”

“Let’s think about it, okay?”

“I will.”

And they did. In fact, the following day when Dean came to pick Cas up from work (as per their usual routine), they stopped by a craft store before heading home. Cas said he was going to buy more feathers, and Dean wanted to look at “something.”

“Here, how ‘bout this?”

He held up a spool of lacy, pink ribbon. Cas put his fingers to his lips and stared, the other hand holding a bag of marabou feathers close and blinking slowly. His cheeks reddened. “Do you mean—for—“

“Mmhmm. It’s nice and soft.”

Cas nodded. “Let’s try…”

Overly giddy, Dean took them to the checkout and bought the supplies. They hurried home and put them into the bedroom. “Dinner first?” asked Cas.

“Sure,” said Dean. Of course he was eager to play, but they were both hungry after a long day of working.

“I’ll make something quick.”

“Whatever you want.”

While Cas undressed completely then put his apron on, Dean returned an earlier phone call from his brother.

“Yo Sammy,” he said into phone, casually pacing around the living room as Jupiter tailed him. “What’s going on?”

“ _I just haven’t heard from you in a while. Is everything alright?”_

“Yeah, I’m great.”

“ _I stopped by your place the other day, but your landlord said you hadn’t been home for a while._ ”

Dean grinned. His eyes darted to the kitchen, where he saw Cas’ butt bouncing around underneath the knot in the back of the apron.

“Been spending more time at Cas’.”

“ _Ooh_ ,” Sam said with a knowing chuckle. “ _So everything is still going well with him?”_

The frying pan began to sizzle and Dean turned from the kitchen slightly, dropping his voice to a hushed volume. “He’s amazing,” said Dean. “You have no idea how much I love him.”

“ _That’s really sweet, Dean. I’m happy for you.”_

“You should come by one day. Hold on.” Dean turned the phone away from his face and called out to Cas, “Sweetpea? You think we could have my brother over for dinner one day?”

“I’d like that!” Cas called back out from the kitchen then Dean brought the phone back.

“You can have dinner at the condo this week.”

“ _I’d love to._ ”

“What day’s good for you?”

“ _Any. Is tomorrow too soon?”_

“I’ll talk to Cas about it and let you know, but as far as I can tell it’s fine. We’re both home by seven, usually.”

“ _Okay, great._ ”

“Well I gotta go. I’ll shoot you a text later, okay?”

_“Cool. Talk to you later, Dean.”_

“Bye.”

Dean hung up the phone then went into the dining room and sat down. Cas came by with two plates of food and set them down in front of their respective seats. “Eggs,” he said. “Scrambled, just as you like them.”

“Thanks, baby.”

“Mmm.” Cas hummed happily and sat down as well. “Do you need anything else?”

“Just you, lookin’ cute like that.”

Cas blushed. “You’re too flattering.”

“Yeah,” Dean chuckled, eying his partner as he began to eat, “Well I mean it.”

Cas took a little bite and muttered, “I know.”

They ate relatively hurried, knowing that a new sexual experiment was right around the corner. After the dishes were cleared, they went to the bedroom and Dean undressed. He had left the spool of ribbon and packet of feathers sitting on the bed. Cas sat down and looked at them nervously.

“Sure you wanna go through with this?” Dean asked, stepping out of his underwear and gently taking his firming cock into his hand. Cas bit his lower lip and looked at him, nodding.

“Yes. I really do want to.”

“You wanna play some music to help you feel better? _Moon River_ or something?”

“I don’t own _Moon River_ to play, but I’ll have some music on.”

Cas went to his sound system and started a soft, ethereal sounding piano song. He smiled at it and looked to Dean. “I’m ready,” he said.”

“Awesome,” Dean smirked. He got on the bed, sitting upon his knees and took the ribbon into his hands. “Now, promise me if anything’s _at all_ uncomfortable, you tell me right away, ‘cause I’ll stop, okay?”

“Yes.”

“And if you’re gonna cum, cum. Cum as much as you want. Don’t think I’ll be mad or anything, okay?”

“Yes.”

“Lay back and put your hands over your head.”

“Yes…”

Cas gently laid onto his back and stretched his hands up to the headboard, elbows bent gently. Dean gave him a tiny kiss and whispered, “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Cas replied, eyes sparkling.

Dean unrolled a long length of the pretty pink ribbon and ripped it off with his fingers. Cas watched with his lips parted, chest heaving slow yet heavily and his face reddening by the second. First, Dean ran the ribbon through one of the iron bars on the headrest and made a knot, then he looped each piece around Cas’ wrists and very, very gently tied them.

“There’s plenty of room to pull out of it if you want to,” Dean said, but Cas was unable to answer. He tugged his wrists apart a little and, upon feeling the resistance, began to mutter and hum low moans, eyes closing and cock instantly hard. “You like that?”

Cas nodded. His hips rocked forward.

“Do you want your feet tied, too?”

He nodded again, tongue licking out between his lips. His eyes fluttered briefly and looked at Dean as he spread his legs. “Like this,” he whispered.

“Sure,” Dean agreed, smiling warmly. He moved down to the foot of the bed and, after taking two more lengths of pink ribbon, repeated what he did to the wrists only he kept the feet separated. Cas twitched and wiggled, pulling his limbs slightly only to react with a loud, needy moan. His cock dribbled precum.

“I guess you like being dominated a little bit, don’t’cha?”

“Yes…”

“How ‘bout we play with the feathers now?”

Cas nodded. His body continued to twist about between the restraints, moaning and purring all the while. He closed his eyes again and turned his head from side the side. Dean, who had trouble keeping his hand off his own cock, managed to open up the bag of feathers and take a big, soft handful. He dropped the onto Cas’ chest then took his palm and lightly moved them around.

“Oooh, my,” Cas moaned. He blushed harder and his fingers tensed.

“You like this?” Dean asked, rubbing feathers over his nipples.

“Oh, Dean…Deaan…I love this…”

“You look beautiful.”

“Mmm…”

Dean picked up a couple fluffy feathers and held them like a tiny feather duster, then flicked them over Cas’ stomach and down to his crotch. He took his time and made many tight circles with them, sending shivers of pleasure through Cas’ body. Then, when he got to his crotch, he tickled the base of Cas’ balls then moved up the shaft of his cock.

“OH, GOSH!” Cas gasped, eyes opening wide. He fidgeted and kept gasping.

“Cum if you gotta cum,” Dean said, speaking very softly and watching Cas’ face with great interest. He brushed the feathers over the tip of his dick and he suddenly shot a hot load out onto them.

“AAAHH!” Cas howled, still gasping and moaning desperately. Dean dropped the feathers and instead grabbed Cas’ cock with his hand, just gently holding the base, and Cas instantly shot more cum out. “OOOH! OH GOSH! OH! OH! DEAAN!”

“That’s good, that’s good!” Dean cheered, not moving his hand at all but keeping it there. Cas trembled and peered down at him, drooling out one side of his mouth.

“M-my cock…” he whispered.

“Yeah, your pretty cock.”

“You’re touching my cock…”

“Is that alright?”

Cas blushed like a tomato and pressed his lips together. “It feels good.”

With a smile of relief, Dean blinked slowly and looked up to meet Cas’ gaze. “I’m glad.”

“Untie me please?”

“Sure thing.”

Dean released him and pulled all the ribbons off. He rolled them up and put everything into the nightstand on his side. One of the feathers had fallen to the ground and Jupiter was passively batting at it.

“Are you going to pleasure yourself now?” Cas asked, getting beneath the covers once he was free. Dean sat there with his legs spread, lightly toying at his own erection.

“Yeah, is that okay?”

Cas didn’t answer. He watched Dean for a moment then slowly, carefully put his hand out and laid it overtop Dean’s.

“You wanna jerk me off?” Dean asked, grinning with redness. Cas just nodded. “Alright.” Dean moved his hand away and let Cas touch him instead. He wrapped his soft fingers around Dean’s shaft and rubbed up and down gently. Dean lay back into the bed and closed his eyes. Feeling Cas on his cock was amazing.

“Is this good?” Cas asked, looking at Dean with worry on his face.

“F-fuck,” Dean grunted. “Best handjob ever. Go a little faster, baby, if you can.”

Cas nodded and worked his fist more. He began to get hard again as well, and when Dean spotted it he asked if he could return the favor.

“Again?” Cas asked.

“Yeah. Only if you want, but I think it’d be hot.”

“Yes, that’s fine.”

Cas readjusted himself so that he was laying just like Dean, still jerking him off (and quite fast now), then Dean put his hand out and lightly cupped his balls.

“Oh, my!” Cas squealed. Dean growled in the bottom of his throat and, rocking his own hips briskly, grasped at Cas’ shaft and pumped just barely. “AAH!” Cas howled. He squeezed Dean’s dick as his own orgasm overtook him. Dean grunted loud and shot his load as well.

“Daaamn…”

“Oh, goodness….ahh…”

“Awesome…”

Their hands let off the cocks and met between them to interlock. They shared a kiss. Two, three, four kisses, actually.

“You’re making a lot of progress,” Dean whispered. Cas took his hand out of Dean’s just for a second so he could clap off the light.

“I feel comfortable with you. More comfortable than any other before.”

“I’m glad. You deserve it.”

They kissed a final time before sleep overtook them. “I love you, Dean.”

“Love you, Cas.”

* * *

“You know, you really didn’t have to go all out.”

“Perhaps, but I wanted to.”

Cas had oven mitts on, and for the first time in a while he was cooking fully dressed. He took a large pan out of the oven and set it onto the stove. Dean leaned over his shoulder and inhaled deeply. “Gotta hand it to you, though,” he added, “’Cause it smells amazing. All things considered.”

“I respect your brother’s dietary choices,” Cas said with a smile. He took off the oven mitts and went to the refrigerator, bypassing Dean to bring out a box of mixed lettuces.

“Can I help?” Dean asked.

“You can set the table if you’d like.”

“No problem.”

They were just ten minutes short of Sam’s arrival, and according to Cas everything had to be “just right.” Dean wondered if he had a skewed opinion of Sam, since it didn’t take much for him to be happy with what Dean was doing.

As soon as the table was set and Dean had opened the wine, the knocker was knocked and they instantly ran to the door.

“Heya, Sammy.”

“Hey, Dean. Hi, Cas. It’s nice to see you.” He held out a bottle of wine that was in a pretty bag. “I got this for you.”

“Thank you,” Cas blushed, smiling, and gave room to step inside.

“So how are ya?” Dean asked.

“I’m great. What about you guys?”

The couple exchanged a knowing glance. “Awesome.” “Lovely.”

“I’m glad to hear it. Hey, this is a pretty big place.”

“It is. Why don’t you come in and make yourself at home? My cat is around here somewhere but I’m sure he won’t say hello,” Cas said. Sam smiled and came all the way into the condo. “Dinner is ready whenever you are.”

“Cool. Smells great, do you mind if I ask what you made?”

Cas took the wine and led them to the dining room, looking over his shoulder with a smile. “Vegetable lasagna,” he said.

“From _scratch?_ ” Sam asked, eyes wide. Dean grinned.

“Yes.”

“You did all of that for me?”

They came to the table and Sam sat down. Dean wanted to help Cas more but Cas insisted that he sit as well.

“I consider you family, Sam,” Cas said, uncorking the wine with a bit of a grunt. Dean mumbled that he could have done it. “And there’s very little I won’t do for family.”

“That’s so sweet,” Sam hummed, beaming at Dean. “I guess I consider you family, too, Cas.”

Cas give a little smirk and opened the wine that they had bought. “Which one would you like?”

“The red’s fine.”

“Dean?”

“Uhhh…red, I guess. Sure.”

Cas poured drinks for the three of them then began serving the lasagna. He had made a salad as well, which Dean ate out of politeness. He thought the lasagna was good though, even without meat, and ended up having two and a half portions of it. Sam just had one but it was fairly large. He also helped himself to the salad.

“So how’s school?” Dean asked his brother.

“Great. It’s going really well. I had to write two essays last night but I think I did great.”

“Two in one night?” Cas asked, cocking his head. “I’m glad I didn’t go to college.”

Sam laughed. “It’s not as bad as it sounds, I swear,” he chuckled, taking a big sip of wine. His cheeks flushed. “I bet you’d love it. Have you considered taking classes ever?”

“Maybe someday,” Cas said, looking down at his plate. “It’s awful expensive, though.”

“What, not gonna pay for you honey to go to school?” Sam asked Dean, jabbing him in the arm.

“I don’t have money falling out of my ass or nothin’!” Dean retorted. Cas looked up. “And besides, I have a better plan with my savings.”

“Oh?” Sam and Cas asked in unison.

“Yep.”

“What is it? I haven’t heard of any plan.”

Dean took a large and rather masculine gulp of wine, slammed the glass down then folded his arms. He looked triumphant. “Well,” he began, glancing at Cas, “Thought maybe I could put a down payment on a house. For you and me.”

Sam clapped twice. “Really! Amazing!”

“ _Ohh…_ ” Cas hummed, putting his hands over his face. He turned brighter than a Christmas tree.

“You okay, baby?”

“Yes…”

“You don’t want that?”

“It’s not that…” He lowered his hands and showed eyes that were starting to tear up. Dean’s expression fell flat. “I do love my condo, but…”

Sam remained quiet.

“But?” Dean asked, looking concerned all of the sudden.

“But I’d love a house with you,” Cas said in a tiny voice. He reached across the table and slid his hand into Dean’s.

“Yeah,” Dean said, smiling in relief. He lightly squeezed the fingers in his fist. “A real home. For us.”

“That’s really nice,” Sam added. He nursed his wine in silence after that, so Dean and Cas could enjoy their moment. But Cas realized that seemed rude, so he started to clean up the dishes and chat to Sam.

“Dean has been the most important person to ever be in my life,” he said rather casually.

“Really?”

“Yes, absolutely. He has…he has changed me for the better.”

“He’s certainly got a strong character,” said Sam, shooting a pleased look to his brother. “After you get a house, we can have mom and dad over.”

“Yeah,” Dean agreed.

The banter continued for some time, but Sam couldn’t stay too late since he had class early in the morning. After a few more glasses of wine and a couple slices of pie, they said their goodbyes and Sam was on his way. He hugged Dean real tight and patted him on the back. “We need to see each other more,” he said.

“Yeah, we do. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry, let’s just work on changing it.”

“Sure, Sammy. You’re right.”

“And Cas?” Sam let go of Dean and turned to his partner. He opened his arms to give him a hug but Cas backed up. Sam looked bemused. “Are you alright?”

“Yes,” Cas said very shortly. He put his arms around himself and backed up more.

“UH,” Dean interjected, stepping between them. He hadn’t told Sam about Cas’ sensitivity and really never planned on it. “He’s not good with hugs. It’s…don’t worry about. Right?”

“ _Sure_ ,” Sam agreed, nodding slowly. Dean made a pained face. “Okay. Well, I’ll see you two again someday. Have a good night.”

“Bye!” Cas said, overly loud as if to make up for his shyness.

“See ya!”

The door closed and Dean turned to Cas, sighing. “Sorry,” he said.

“Sorry?”

“Sorry that Sam put you on the spot like that.”

“It’s fine,” said Cas, shaking his head. He gave a little smile and began walking back to the bedroom. “I don’t expect him to understand. I’m used to that reaction.”

“Sure? I can talk to him about it if you’d like.”

“I wouldn’t worry about it.”

“Well, okay.”

“It’s been a long day. I’m ready to get into bed.”

“Yeah, me, too.”

They turned off all the lights and went to bedroom, where Cas clapped the lamp on and got washed up in the bathroom. Dean undressed and followed suit. Once they were both naked and clean, they returned to the bed and Cas sat down. He looked up at him with big eyes. “Dean?”

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, I…”

Dean sat next to him and took his hand. “What is it, Cas?”

Cas leaned over and gave Dean a soft kiss on the lips. They held it for a moment, smacking gently, and Cas slowly brought his hand up to Dean’s cheek. His fingers touched along his jaw then cupped it. Dean smiled into the kiss. “What’re you doing?” he managed to ask.

Cas broke the kiss off but kept their faces close. He stared at him in the dim light. “I want to make love,” he whispered.

“Are you serious?” Dean asked, eyes widening.

“Please…”

“Okay…how do you want it?”

“Like this.”

Cas let go of Dean and lay back on the bed. He spread his legs and lightly toyed with himself. Dean growled a little and licked his lips. “Can I rim you first?”

“I-I suppose.”

“Tell me if it’s too much, okay?”

“Okay…”

Dean leaned down to Cas’ crotch and put both hands on his cheeks. He rolled him back somewhat and spread them, showing his little hole. Cas took a deep breath as his cock hardened.

“I’ll be gentle…”

He initially put a kiss onto the pucker. Cas gasped, focusing on Dean’s work. Next he took out his tongue and just tapped it there, which made Cas moan and close his eyes. His cock throbbed and dripped a bit of precum.

“Alright?” Dean asked.

“Don’t stop…”

Dean smirked and started to lick the hole now. He wet it nicely and worked his tongue gently.

“Aah!” Cas yelped. He clawed at the mattress and tossed his head back. “Oh, Dean!”

“Mmmm…”

He prodded into the hole with his tongue, causing Cas to wiggle and moan more. He gasped and cooed, heating up all over.

“Like it?”

“Yes…”

“Let’s try this.”

Dean got up for a second and took some lubricant from the nightstand. He rubbed it onto his finger and carefully slid it into Cas’ hole.

“OH!”

“Good?”

“OH, GOSH!”

He wiggled it around, exploring Cas deeply. Dean’s eyes were fixed on the hole as it throbbed around his finger. “Beautiful,” he said.

“Oh, Dean! DEAN!”

A second finger came inside now, scissoring and prodding deep. Cas brought a trembling hand to his package and began to play with himself again. Dean put little kisses onto his taint while he fingered him a little faster.

“Want me to fuck you?”

“Yes!”

“You sure? Think you’re ready for my cock!”

“Oh, Dean! Please!”

“Alright.”

His fingers came out and he sat onto his knees. Cas’ eyes were fluttering, cheeks bright red and sweat was already beading down his forehead. Dean rubbed more lubricant on his fingers and slathered it over his cock.

“You look so beautiful, Cas, so beautiful.”

“I’m happy…”

“Me, too. I’m gonna put my dick in you now. Tell me if it hurts.”

“I’m not a virgin,” Cas hummed with a bit of sass.

“I know, I know, I just wanna be careful.”

“Mmm….”

“Okay, here we go.”

Cas took a deep breath as Dean came closer and pressed the head of his cock to his pucker. He gently pushed inside, stretching the rim delightfully so. Cas reached his hands up high to his pillow and pulled at it, tensing his jaw and furrowing his forehead.

“Okay?” Dean huffed. Pleasure rippled through his body continuously.

“Ooh…good…oh, Dean…”

“Gonna put more in.”

He eased his thick shaft further inside, feeling Cas’ ring of muscle contracting over and over as he moaned and quivered. Once he got deep enough to thrust and get a bit of motion, Dean decided he would lean down and put his arms around Cas. He hugged the warm, sweaty body and put his face into the crook of Cas’ neck.

“Dean!!” Cas shouted. He flung his arms around Dean’s torso and rocked his body up, cumming hard. He squeezed him and moaned wildly. “DEEAAAAN!”

“Let go, Cas. Cum, cum,” Dean huffed against his neck, starting to fuck him hard. He nuzzled his nose against Cas’ damp flesh and murmured, “ _Moon river, wider than a mile…I don’t know the words…hmm-hmm…_ ”

Cas let out a sigh and regained himself. His fingers rubbed in circles over Dean’s shoulder blades and he laughed lightly. “It’s feel so wonderful!”

He came again, this time putting his legs around Dean’s waist. It seemed all of his notions of touching being too sensitive were gone. He tossed his head to and fro, gasping and shouting loudly. Dean looked up at him and saw this wild, unfettered Cas he had hardly seen before. Sweat dribbled down his face and his hair was is messy tufts. He thrust and thrust up into each of Dean’s pummels. They grunted in time with each other and Dean moved up to give Cas a kiss. Their lips smacked together wetly, Cas had another sticky orgasm and they ground harder.

“Oh, God,” Dean moaned against Cas’ mouth. “Oh my God, I’m gonna cum.”

He sucked onto his lower lip as he felt deep pleasure quiver through his body. He plowed hard into Cas’ hole, filling him with his hot loud, then collapsed.

“Jesus…”

Cas wiggled and came again. His limbs fell limp. Dean ran his palm down Cas’ hot side, basking in the glory of feeling his body. “Baby…”

“Oh, Dean…”

They kissed again, weakly.

“I’m touching you…”

“I know…”

“Not too much?”

“No, no, it’s wonderful…”

“Love you, Cas…”

“I love you, Dean…”

They kissed once more, this time looking at each other. They both smiled. “This is the best,” Dean whispered.

“It will be better when we have a home.”

Dean narrowed his eyes, smiling wider. “And we’re married.”

Cas gasped softly. “Really?”

“Really. Let’s do it.”

“Oh, Dean!”

“I want you in my arms for the rest of my life.”

Cas started to tear up. “Oh, _Dean!_ ” They kissed again.

“You can be my sensitive, beautiful little wife.”

“Yes, yes, I will. I love you, Dean.”

“I love you, Cas. I always will.”

He squeezed Cas tighter then rolled onto his side, rubbing together in a spooning position. Cas was more relaxed than he ever had been, and that was just fine. Dean was truly the greatest person he had ever met. But they had both equally benefited from the lesson learned; that the best things are always worth waiting for, and their prize lasted for the rest of their lives.

  **~*~ The End ~*~**

 

 


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